tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19427266759477032132024-03-13T22:54:48.411-04:00The QuestKJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.comBlogger1214125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-3410874251619217572012-09-23T19:44:00.001-04:002012-09-23T20:19:39.388-04:00My Ass is Kicked<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I think I would blog more if my computer worked properly. Honestly. Keys don't work, I have to use the Shift on the left side of the keyboard only because the other one is broken, keys stick...it's amazing really.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">BAD WEEKEND. It didn't start out bad....not completely though I think life was giving me warnings on Friday when little shit was going wrong. I had a sleep over on Friday night with some of my dearest friends in the world and had an amazing time. The Brit was taking the Red Eye home from San Francisco and the kids were at grandma's for the night. We had four bottles of wine, played games, laughed a lot and went to bed very late.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Woke up Saturday to finding out that The Genius had gotten up in the middle of the night at grandma's and took her car for a spin. He doesn't have a license and has not yet done driver's education because we won't let him until he becomes motivated enough to get a job. He drove from Clear Spring to McDonalds and then to Williamsport. When heading back to grandma's house he was pulled over by the police and will have to go to court. I guess as he was in the grandparent's care and their car, the police called them and left us a voice mail at home, where no one was, so we did not know about it until 10:00 Saturday morning...which bothers me a little bit. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">After talking to a therapist through my EAP, I went out, picked him up and took him to the hospital for an evaluation. They asked him a million questions. He was pretty emotional, not suicidal and very shaken up. Said he had never been so scared as he was when he was pulled over. He and I actually had a really good conversation. I figured it was of little use to be yelling; he only shuts down. He always has. I learned some thinks through the therapist's questions that I had never known before- such as that his bio-dad used to smack around his bio-mom. He remembers that, but very little else about his childhood. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">The therapist and I talked privately and she was wonderful. She had seen many other adopted kids like The Genius and was knowledgeable about them. She recommended a therapist and when I explained his last therapist she shook her head and said "He doesn't need a buddy-he needs an aggressive therapist." She also wants a meds re-evaluation. She said she would have diagnosed him that day on depressive something or other but I forget the term she used. She said that some things that can help these kinds of kids are over-praising what he does right, hugging often etc. She told me without my having to tell her that she knew I barely knew this kid because he is a closed book and she knew my stress levels with him were through the rough, but she said lots of hugging, even if I don't feel it. That's a hard one for me, because I am not overly huggy anyway, but I am trying. We have had several good conversations since yesterday which feels like a good start if I can keep him talking. Per the therapist, he is not longer allowed to answer questions we ask him with "yes, no, I don't know or fine." She said he had lots of stuff deep down in his gut that need to come out and she is hoping with a good therapist, in six months time, we will see a difference in him. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">But it has been stressful at my house. The Brit is still not speaking to him which is frustrating and fruitless in my opinion. I know we all get upset with him as he pulls some stunts and he always has, but I still think we have to work through it all together. Being a mom, this scared me too as no matter how not close I have felt to this child, I still hope that one day he can live a normal life. If he can't, I at least want to know I have done all I could for him. He has always had issues and has always been closed off and so far, no therapist has been able to reach him. I am hoping that one with a reputation for being aggressive might be able to do just that. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">So long weekend....</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">There may be another interesting story in the next day or two that has nothing to do with my kids...will keep you posted. </span>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-57132094597589547352012-09-18T20:18:00.000-04:002012-09-18T20:18:53.563-04:00Recovery is a Process<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">So pink eye or as the doctor said "viral conjunctivitis" takes a long time to heal when your doctor sucks. Thus was my experience with The Bergman Eye Center. The doctor told me even after a second visit that it just had to run its course. After nine days of not being able to read, drive or watch television, missing two days of work and popping pain killers for the agony that had become my eyes which looked like they were bleeding, I consulted my regular eye doc (my PCP had set up the specialist appointment with Bergman). My eye doc was appalled at the treatment I had received and promptly prescribed me three medications that had me improving in 12 hours. Almost three weeks later, my eyes are still not completely back to normal, but I have been able to resume normal activities. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Food-wise I am doing better. I am in the process of setting new rules for myself such as:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">1) No fast food-cannot believe I fell back into this at all. It was not severe but it was bad enough to remind myself that I know better.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">2) No soda. One cup of coffee, then water or tea. Period. No diet soda either. Too much sodium and I have read some scary things about diet soda.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">3) Exercise is a must. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I have lost eight pounds in the last two weeks. I can handle that. I am a dieting expert but now it is time to become a food expert. I know what is bad for me and bad is okay now and then, but only now and then. The fact remains that I feel so much better when I eat well. When I eat crap, I feel like crap and every time I feel like crap I am reminded of that fact. Wish I could bottle the horrible feeling unhealthy food gives me and take a tiny sip of it when I am tempted to not eat well. It would make my life so much easier. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Okay, going to try to blog much more regularly now that I can see again!</span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_CgOl8h2hcRF7LHFowi40RCGOjuKv78UabdSahgMFTKPkD033RR8JenbPJkwAL6ZAMbJgMM_QmI1FYbTwfPOawRmaGO6OS9EM8fLMmBfPayskvK4LIM4wUgqkZZWywXykQgWB2uN9ijM/s1600/no+fast+food.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_CgOl8h2hcRF7LHFowi40RCGOjuKv78UabdSahgMFTKPkD033RR8JenbPJkwAL6ZAMbJgMM_QmI1FYbTwfPOawRmaGO6OS9EM8fLMmBfPayskvK4LIM4wUgqkZZWywXykQgWB2uN9ijM/s320/no+fast+food.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-59025530931226000902012-09-03T20:20:00.002-04:002012-09-03T21:24:15.653-04:00Pink Eye and Weight Gain and Sinuses...Oh My!<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Life has been rough since August 12th. Started with a sinus infection which has gone on forever despite antibiotics. Now I have spent the holiday weekend with bilateral pink eye, which has been bangin'. They look slightly better now than they did this morning so i am hoping the eye antibiotics are working.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So here I am again, trying to turn over a new leaf. I could probably not even step up the exercise (though it would not hurt) if I turned down the food. Every day starts out with the best of intentions, but then something gets stressful or there is a better lunch offer on the table than what I have brown bagged, and it all goes to hell. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Obviously, control with food has always been an issue in my life and WLS did not fix it. I am far from gaining everything back I lost but I also know if I don't get things back in order, it could only be a matter of time. I'm in an exercise rut as well; still kickboxing once a week and walking a few nights a week but I need to switch up the walking route I think. I have read that the body gets accustomed to one routine and it no longer reacts the way we want it to. It's just easier to keep walking the same route.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Nighttime snacking is another issue, so issues I got! Carbs have always been the issue. Oddly enough, I love fresh fruits and veggies but prepackaged carbs are easier. Do we see a theme here? </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Working full time has given me an issue the last year and a half. I am tired when I get off work and morning workouts are not really an option due to kids, school and well, I am not a morning person. The flip side of this, of course is that getting my weight back down will make me feel better in all aspects.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The other battle I face is living with all males who eat all the freakin' time. An hour after dinner, they are back in the fridge and then a half hour after that, etc. The good news is that usually they are watching male stuff on television so I go upstairs. What I need to change is that when I go upstairs I need to get on the treadmill and watch something interesting. It is easy (there is that word again) to fall into the patterns of those around you, whether it be at home or at work. I work with many people who are not healthy eaters, several who get fast food several times a week, one who does not eat properly as in she doesn't eat enough (for lunch she drinks a bottle of water if she is hungry). I can easily fall into the fast food pattern and have on too many occasions lately. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Now the good news is that every day is a new start. Tomorrow it begins again. I know how to play by the rules and need to go back to not doing what is easy.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Easy needs to no longer exist in my health world. </span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjE7yn-zpqMQZ59To6MOJxRbH71vRN58DS-LPdjKCQJreOxyanjoXlyjW3PyPiBUVc48FSyZ9R1g5I1JCUJVEsoLUNM6PlIPVFrWA6uM9gEgshXa3jroRVjz5tJwstyVmYyf0wGC8Pul6I/s1600/weight-loss-quotes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjE7yn-zpqMQZ59To6MOJxRbH71vRN58DS-LPdjKCQJreOxyanjoXlyjW3PyPiBUVc48FSyZ9R1g5I1JCUJVEsoLUNM6PlIPVFrWA6uM9gEgshXa3jroRVjz5tJwstyVmYyf0wGC8Pul6I/s1600/weight-loss-quotes.jpg" /></a></div>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-61067947461649521002012-07-08T16:32:00.000-04:002012-07-08T16:32:12.215-04:00Nag, Nag, nag<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Jimnotmike and Tod have been griping at me about lack of blogging. I think about blogging a lot. It is just a time thing and a trying to get my thoughts together thing. I do know that I am far more accountable about things when I am blogging and that reason alone should be enough of a reason to get on it again. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I am still working on getting back on target with exercise and eating. Eating has been improving but exercise not so much. I have been walking Rhys a few nights a week but Michael had a temporary schedule change at the Y so I have not been to kickboxing in about three weeks. He should be back this week thankfully but really, that is no excuse for not getting to the gym. I have also had the joy of being diagnosed with arthritis in my left knee and I think it is also in my </span>left hip. This has been a bit problematic but I am trying to work around it. Getting more weight off will help with the knee undoubtedly. <br />
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A Facebook friend directed me to this:<br />
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<img alt="Fitbit Ultra Wireless Activity Plus Sleep Tracker" border="0" height="300" src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/31pCKcmW%2BKL._AA300_PIbundle-1,TopRight,0,0_AA300_SH20_.jpg" width="300" /><br />
This is called Fitbit and in reading about it, it not only sounds cool but the reviews on it are mostly very positive. To steal from the Amazon description for those of you who are interested:<br />
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<h5>
Track All Day Activity</h5>
Using a 3-D motion sensor, Fitbit
Ultra tracks all the details about your daily activity that conventional
pedometers would miss. When worn close to the body, this device tracks
daily steps, number of stairs climbed, distance traveled, calories
burned, and overall intensity of the activity level. Fitbit Ultra also
contains an altimeter to track stairs or hills climbed. The compact
design of the Tracker makes it easy to wear tucked into your pocket,
clipped to a belt or bra all day.<br />
<h5>
Track Your Sleep</h5>
You can
also wear the Tracker at night with the included Fitbit wristband to
monitor how long and how well you sleep. Fitbit Ultra will monitor when
you fall asleep and how many times you woke up throughout the night to
provide a sleep efficiency index.<br />
<h5>
Achieve Real Results With Fitbit</h5>
Fitbit
Ultra can help you reach your exercise, diet and overall wellness
goals. In fact, Fitbit users increase their daily steps by 43 percent
and have lost an average of 13 pounds.*<br />
<h5>
Wirelessly Uploads Data to Fitbit.com</h5>
To
help you gauge your progress, Fitbit Ultra wirelessly uploads your
fitness data to Fitbit.com automatically whenever you're within 15 feet
of your computer--no need to take time out of your busy day to enter
stats.<br />
<h5>
Track Your Fitness Trends and Goals Online</h5>
At
Fitbit.com, you'll enjoy free online tools that show how your activity
measures up over time and keep you motivated, with no monthly fee
required. Your dashboard quickly shows you how close you are to
achieving your weekly goals on calories burned, steps taken, and other
fitness goals.<br />
Fitbit makes fitness fun by translating your real
accomplishments into real life examples. For instance, tracking that
you've climbed 22 floors is the same as climbing to the top of the
Statue of Liberty. To keep you motivated, you can earn badges for daily
and lifetime fitness activities.<br />
<h5>
Social and Community Tools For Encouragement</h5>
Invite
friends through email or through Facebook to connect on Fitbit.com to
build a fitness network. Set collaborative or competitive challenges
together, or tap into the growing Fitbit.com community to access tips
and receive encouragement. With Fitbit, it's like working out with a
group of virtual friends every day.<br />
<h5>
Log Food and Workouts</h5>
You
can build a complete picture of your overall fitness by logging foods
and workouts. The Fitbit database has over a 100,000 specific food items
for you to select from. Enter workout specifics from yoga, Pilates,
elliptical workouts, boot camp, spinning, kickboxing, and even Wii games
from the workout database. Fitbit's Food Goal feature shows you the
range of calories you should stick to every day to reach your weight
loss goals, and dynamically adjusts based on your day's activities. You
can also track your weight and other health indicators like blood
pressure, glucose, and heart rate.<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">And that is only a part of the stuff it does. There is an app for my phone with it as well. If The Brit gets it for me for my birthday, I will report back on how it performs. I have always been enthralled by the BodyBugg they use on The Biggest Loser but that bad boy runs at least $15</span>0.00. FitBit seems to do the same stuff for a lesser price and the website to use is free...not sure about the website for the Bugg. <br />
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I will try to be more regular around here! Also wanted to again change the blog name but have not figured out how to do it!<br />
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Oh and I am again between churches. Taking a break from Christians for awhile....<br />KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-17194685464257799622012-03-12T20:30:00.000-04:002012-03-12T20:30:51.331-04:00Manic Monday does not begin to describe it<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">Today was insane!</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">Let me set the scene...I am currently working two jobs. My old job of Admin Assistant kept me busy nearly every single day the past year for eight hours a day. Plus, our Events Coordinator, who was almost my work husband before I decided it just would not work out, uses me all the time to do his work. So when I was just an Admin Assist, it was fine because I would have just enough spare time to help him design posters or whatever else he needed done. Now, I am the Volunteer Coordinator, a position that has been empty for a few months so I have 165 applicants that need to be interviewed, they need to have an orientation and they need three training classes....all of which are my responsibility and I have never done any of it before. Oh and I am self training really as my boss has never run the volunteer program. They have not yet posted my old position (and I will need to train that person) so I have two full time jobs right now and one paycheck. Though the paycheck is not the problem; the problem is being insanely busy, trying to keep up with my old job and trying in the midst of that to learn my new job. </span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">So this morning, the Events guy, my ex almost work husband, starts slamming me with things he needs...stupid things which are not my job. Then he needed help with the stamp machine, then he wanted me to work one of his events which is not my job and I ignored that email.</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">Then the high school called with my son in the office. See, he (The Genius) has broken up with his girlfriend because he decided he might be bi-sexual. Then Friday night, she called him despite the fact that a week ago her parents told The Genius that they would call the police if HE called HER again. So she cries to him that she still loves him and misses him and then he puts her on Mute to talk to me and she hangs up on him. He calls her back and she has her father answer the phone to tell The Genius that she is "Done" and he is not to call her again. WTF?</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">So today, he was in his class with one of her friends, who passed him a note asking what had happened between them and The Genius proceeds to write the girl a two page note talking about how crazy his ex was and how she had been committed to an institution for help a few years ago, etc. Though he was in no trouble, I was furious with him beings he and I had sat up Friday night and I had told him he needed to leave her alone completely. Basically the principal told them both to stay away from each other, but I am still waiting for the police to show up at the door. I am so done with teenage romance.</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">Now in good news...I RAN yesterday! First time in a year and it was not as bad as I thought it would be. On top of a run, I also had a walk with MyTod so it was a double day. Every day is a struggle for me still with weight. I don't think that is ever going to go away. It's so hard. But I am doing the best I can, some days better than others, but always trying to be conscious about it. </span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #4c1130;">Here's to winning the battle one day and to tomorrow being a better day! </span></b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-72755848224346242742012-03-03T16:38:00.000-05:002012-03-03T16:38:28.895-05:00Weight Struggles<b>Time for my quarterly post!</b><br />
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<b>No, seriously, I really want to try to get back here more often. I am starting to miss it and I think after the blog blowup at the old church, the idea of blogging left a bad taste in my mouth for a long time. We always remember the bad stuff, don't we? </b><br />
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<b>So I am still struggling. Have not been on the scales due to fear. Still wearing a now snug size 18 pants and so do not want to switch sizes. I still have a plastic bin full of size 14s that I had goals of wearing one day and I still cannot bring myself to get rid of them. I am able to hit the gym about twice a week and I manage to walk twice a week in the evenings or weekend afternoons. And I still snack all the freaking time. Pretzels, animal crackers, sometimes those chewy sugary goodness called orange slices or swedish fish. Chocolate? Not so much. On rare occasion if I really want to feel lousy afterward. </b><br />
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<b>Every single day I think about getting the extra pounds off. Mostly it is a carb downfall. Bread, how I love you! Pasta is an easy pack and go lunch. I have almost forgotten how I used to eat but I think part of the problem is that is that since my surgery I have never learned how to eat on a full time work basis. When I was part time at the church from hell, I had a plan. I had a snack after two hours and two hours later, was off work and hitting the gym. Came home, had something light and was good until dinner. Now, I have five hours from the time I start work until I take lunch and will nibble things in that time. Then there is lunch where I try to take some leftovers from home with the exception of Fridays when Teressa and I always split a small pizza. Breakfast on a good day is either some Kashi cereal with soy milk or oatmeal. On a bad day, it is bagel and low fat cream cheese from Panera, which of course, is all carb and doesn't stick with me long. </b><br />
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<b>Do I still get full? Yes, uncomfortably so. But I am often convinced that the food tastes too good to stop eating. Gotta finish the whole thing. </b><br />
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<b>I need to get a plan back in action. My muffin top is becoming a cake top and it has to go. My energy is not where it used to be, I don't feel as good as I used to and I have been battling a cold for three weeks, where when I weighed less, it was rare for me to get sick. </b><br />
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<b>So let's talk! What works? What snacks are satisfying and still healthy? Anyone else doing battle? I am resolving to buy no animal crackers or pretzels tomorrow at the store. But I will need to substitute it with something. I know I can get this weight back off if I can come up with a plan. I had a great taste of what health was like and I crave getting back there!</b><br />
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<b>In other news, I have gotten a promotion at work to Volunteer Coordinator, but am currently trying to learn that job while still doing my old job until I am replaced. My oldest son has decided he is bisexual. My youngest is in middle school, which is a whole 'nother ball game. My dog is still awesome, I love my job and am anxious for winter to be over. </b><br />
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<b>Seems that what is standing between me and happiness is a bag of pretzels, some animal crackers and a handful of orange slices.</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgczk90kXbxBgG1OlTO6tWc5VYfeqiMrODerqyN2LcqViLFVLRZYe2cqI2bgYw9AG1imj19-LhdNCxyx2c8WT3XVJmzmNd3kkWVFePnKNr3iFoLineQabTHXtHxH7Y7xst6e0WqFT3H0FU/s1600/haha.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="278" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgczk90kXbxBgG1OlTO6tWc5VYfeqiMrODerqyN2LcqViLFVLRZYe2cqI2bgYw9AG1imj19-LhdNCxyx2c8WT3XVJmzmNd3kkWVFePnKNr3iFoLineQabTHXtHxH7Y7xst6e0WqFT3H0FU/s320/haha.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b> </b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-57407064872921815262011-11-08T21:49:00.002-05:002011-11-08T21:50:22.128-05:00Confessional<div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>I have needed to come clean for quite some time now. Like many people, I often hope that not talking about something will either make it go away or an even better scenario is that I can not talk about, fix it without even mentioning it and then it is like it never happened. But what I am quickly learning is that neither of these options are recipes for success. </b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>So here it is; raw and real.</b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b> </b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>I have gained 30 pounds.</b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>You have no idea how horrible and ashamed I feel to write those words. With people I see day to day I can't hide it. Weight is always there for all the world to see. Some of you may have sensed my struggles on Facebook as I hinted at it; at not having time to get to the gym or at eating things I should not be eating.</b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b> </b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>I can trace it back a year when the problems started for me. Food has always been a coping mechanism for me as it is for most people who battle it. When my church life turned upside down, I found myself slowly starting to return to food as a means of dealing with the pain and betrayal. Then there was the new job and not just the stress that comes with a new job, but going from twenty hours a week to forty. Suddenly, I was no longer getting off work at 12:30 and heading to the gym before any of the men in my family were even home to know I was missing. Now it is get off work at 5:00, go home and cook and can we talk about being tired after being at work for nine hours? I often find that once I am home, it is so hard to find the will to go back out and hit the gym. Honestly, it barely happens and most evenings, I simply opt for a walk instead.</b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>Now, a walk would probably be fine were I being super careful of my food intake but most days, I am not. Sitting at a desk all day, I find myself nibbling. I am trying to do better but it is a daily battle.</b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b> </b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>After my surgery, I documented everything here, got support and advice and I know it helped me. I shared what I learned and read about what others were doing. Now, here I am, barely blogging so probably not many readers still remaining. The fresh new post-op me, was replaced by just "me" and I have gotten lost somewhere along the way. Somewhere along the way, I have put aside the things I know are the right things to do. I have gone back to making excuses and if I don't get my act together, I am going to reach the point of no return where I will be so far off track that getting back on track will be overwhelming.</b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>So, here I am. Honest. Scared. Worried. Unhappy. Feeling alone in this and trying to turn this ship around. I don't want to wind up back where I was. That would make everything I went through; surgery, preparing for it, recovering from it, working so hard to lose 109 pounds, in vain. I cannot bear the thought of it. </b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b> </b></span></div><div style="color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;"><b>I hope some of you are still here to share this with me. </b></span></div>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-45785520646673519822011-10-24T21:04:00.000-04:002011-10-24T21:04:33.495-04:00A Year LaterSo a year ago, a huge part of my life changed. A year ago, after not getting any results from the church council, I blogged about my discontent and was attacked by people I had known and trusted my entire life. I have learned a lot in a year, some good, some not as good.<br />
<br />
<ul><li>I have learned that no matter how much you think you know someone you really don't. </li>
<li>I have learned that people who are supposed to be among the most trustworthy will lie to save their own ass or to make themselves look better.</li>
<li>I have learned that not even church is safe, even though it should be.</li>
<li> I have learned that people will go to great lengths to be "right".</li>
<li>I have learned that sometimes good people who should fight for you won't because they are afraid and that this does not make them bad people. It only makes them fearful people.</li>
<li>I have learned that there is no replacement for people who know you well and you can be yourself with. I miss being with these people.</li>
<li>I have learned that at times God wants me to act, even if I don't want to.</li>
<li>I have learned that maybe you cannot be spiritually fulfilled and still be surrounded with people you want to spend a lot of time with. So far in my life, it has been one or the other.</li>
</ul>So there you have it. It has been a hard year. I am spiritually happy and miss my friends. I still see them but not as often as I would like and certainly not every Sunday. I spent some time with them Saturday and there is just no replacement for those relationships. They are what I lost. I gained being spiritually fulfilled. <br />
<br />
One day maybe there will be both.KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-12537663836942703862011-10-09T20:56:00.000-04:002011-10-09T20:56:45.613-04:00In Search of Self Control and a Good Night's SleepAh, the wayward blogger returns. Seems there is so much I want to do and not enough hours in the day to accomplish much of any of it. But I really need to start prioritizing a few things or I am going to be totally screwed in the long run and will have no one to blame but myself.<br />
<br />
I keep talking about doing things but cannot seem to fit them into my schedule to actually accomplish much of anything but the fact is that if I do not start making myself a priority I am going to put on more weight and the pounds I have gained since last March already need to go. My head keeps wanting to go back to running as I am thinking it will help keep things under control along with controlling my carb addiction, but my knees and the clock have been disagreeing with me. But I need to give it another go. I was never much good at it really but on some sadistic level I apparently enjoyed it as my head keeps returning to the thought. <br />
<br />
I have gone back to kickboxing and have been trying to hit the gym but it is hard. Yet I know that cannot be an excuse. I have some tight clothing and I refuse to start buying larger sizes. Hell to the no. I grocery shopped healthy today. I even waffled over some protein powder but let's be realistic...I hated that shit. But I need to go back to eating like a healthy person. I used to do it easily and am not sure when it got complicated. I think I got comfortable and complacent and figured my problems days were over and that I could eat like other people and just not think about/care about what I was putting in my mouth. <br />
<br />
The fact is that it will never work that way for me. I am not one of those people. They exist; the ones who can eat anything and never gain an ounce but it will never be me. I need to accept that and move on. Working on it.<br />
<br />
I have still struggled with sleep issues and have just switched over to the Ambien Extended Release. Last night was the first night on it and it went well. Here's hoping.KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-91813134115986245692011-09-06T22:23:00.000-04:002011-09-06T22:23:36.676-04:00The Angel<b>So not too long after The Brit and I got married, my mother went shopping in Lancaster, PA and she brought me home this beautiful ceramic angel. I am very angel particular. They have to have pretty faces as no one likes a pissed off angel; they just have to look "angelic". This one did and she was pretty big; about 8 or 9 inches high, kneeling, hands raised</b>, <b>dark hair, long blue skirt and white blouse. She is one of the prettiest angels I have ever seen.</b><br />
<br />
<b>She came to my house in a box and when we opened her, we sadly discovered a broken wing. It had broken clean off, but The Brit was certain he could fix it and he did. As the wing attached in the back, looking at her one could not see any evidence of the breakage. </b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>I kept her safely on a shelf at the desk, up high where the cats could not knock her down and she resided there for several years until one night, someone knocked the desk and caused her to fall from the shelf and break into several pieces. Worried at first that she was not fixable, I was thrilled when The Brit once again pieced her together, minus a spot here and there where holes remained, those remnants broken into pieces too tiny to repair. </b><br />
<br />
<b>These days, at quick glance, the angel appears perfect; a striking image of the perfection God would have made her were she real. She is kept in a lower but still safe place and it is only at closer inspection you can see her battle scars; a missing piece here, a rather large hole in the back. Still beautiful but far from perfect.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>How like us she is! For some reason the saga of my angel was on my heart the other day even though it has been probably three years since her last accident. But she is like us. From the outside we can appear to have it all together, to even be somewhat perfect, but only once you really start to see inside of someone can you see their "holes"; their scars that life has dealt them. Sometimes you have to look very closely because many of us keep our imperfections, our hurts, our betrayals well hidden. But often it is worth the time to look and to try to understand.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>What is wonderful is that like the angel, who was created by a master craftsman somewhere, we have also been created by a Master Craftsman who sees all our holes and loves us not just despite them but because of them. In His eyes, we are perfect and precious and loved, despite our faults.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>Just sayin'.</b><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0hlm6h_WEx6xSJmAqvvBW_7-UXnDnJbm1A7tU8dcKT5R88d7GYkwTgw8ueMnhjbgBbsHNZOh7eqeZ5oukCBhRRfunJA1TN2kCY7C4lVmTHvxoFjl-bv-RNZ95moDQKP-NEjEtzosOPCs/s1600/angel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0hlm6h_WEx6xSJmAqvvBW_7-UXnDnJbm1A7tU8dcKT5R88d7GYkwTgw8ueMnhjbgBbsHNZOh7eqeZ5oukCBhRRfunJA1TN2kCY7C4lVmTHvxoFjl-bv-RNZ95moDQKP-NEjEtzosOPCs/s320/angel.jpg" width="191" /></a></div><b> </b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-68926700789439765572011-08-21T20:41:00.000-04:002011-08-21T20:41:52.414-04:00Keeping It Real<b>So they say the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem so I am going to put a little faith into that and hope to an extent it holds true.</b><br />
<br />
<b>I have been struggling with some weight regain.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>There. I said it. Since my lowest and relatively comfortable weight for me, of 209, I have gained about 28 pounds...most of it since starting back to work full time. I know that carbs are my problem and I am still wrestling with what to do about it, but I know I have to do something.</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>There is something called "The 5 Day Pouch Test" that has existed in the WLS surgery community for some time as carbs tend to be a post op problem after a few years. Here is what I read about it last night:</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<i><b>Slurry food, more commonly described as slider food ,</b>is a watery liquid food solution of simple processed carbohydrates containing scant nutritional value. The substance usually comes from crackers, pretzels, cracker snacks, popcorn, cheese snacks, potato chips or tortilla chips, or sugar-free cookies, cakes, and candy. The foods are chewed and washed down with liquids into the surgical stomach pouch where the gastric muscles churn them into slurry which slips directly into the intestine to be quickly processed and stored as body fat. Patients of all bariatric <a class="kLink" href="http://www.5daypouchtest.com/articles/art014.html#" id="KonaLink6" style="font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static; text-decoration: underline !important;"><span style="color: #f26522; font-family: inherit ! important; font-size: inherit ! important; font-weight: inherit ! important; position: static;"><span class="kLink" style="color: #f26522 !important; font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static;">weight </span><span class="kLink" style="color: #f26522 !important; font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static;">loss </span><span class="kLink" style="color: #f26522 !important; font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static;">procedures</span></span></a> including gastric bypass, adjustable gastric banding (lap-band), and gastric sleeve, are prone to weight gain if copious amounts of slurry food are consumed.</i><br />
<br />
<i>After surgery many bariatric patients find the restrictive feeling following eating to be uncomfortable, yet it is the very nature of the surgical gastric pouch to cause a tight restricted feeling after a small amount of solid food has been consumed. This signals the patient to stop eating. Uncomfortable with this restricted feeling, many patients turn to softer processed simple carbohydrates or junk food that can be washed down with liquids creating slurry. The uncomfortable restricted feeling never occurs and patients can eat unmeasured portions without feeling discomfort. Soon the weight loss they were enjoying has stopped and weight regain begins.</i><br />
<br />
I<i>n a malabsorptive procedure the pouch is made and the stoma or outlet is attached to the lower part of the middle intestine called the jejunum. The majority of caloric absorption takes place in the jejunum, so depending upon where your surgeon created the outlet the level of absorption can vary. Skilled surgeons will adjust the length of intestine bypassed according to their patient's projected needs based on dieting history and pre-op psychological screening. <ins style="border: none; display: inline-table; height: 15px; margin: 0; padding: 0; position: relative; visibility: visible; width: 468px;"><ins id="aswift_4_anchor" style="border: none; display: block; height: 15px; margin: 0; padding: 0; position: relative; visibility: visible; width: 468px;"></ins></ins> </i><br />
<i>Slider foods slide right through the stoma into the jejunum. My first test of the slider foods was graham crackers and coffee for my after work snack. Now imagine, I could eat a stack of graham crackers and wash it right through the pouch with the coffee and never feel any satiation. What resulted was an easily absorbed slurry that my jejunum sucked up like a sponge - it didn't have to do any work to absorb this simple carbohydrate slurry. Of course, <a class="kLink" href="http://www.5daypouchtest.com/plan/faq.html#" id="KonaLink16" style="font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static; text-decoration: underline !important;"><span style="color: #f26522; font-family: inherit ! important; font-size: inherit ! important; font-weight: inherit ! important; position: static;"><span class="kLink" style="color: #f26522 !important; font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static;">weight </span><span class="kLink" style="color: #f26522 !important; font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static;">gain</span></span></a> resulted and I had to give up this little indulgence. Another popular slider food is pretzels. I speak with post-ops all the time who are addicted to pretzels - again, this is a simple carb that your jejunum is very happy to receive and convert to fat. Traditionally dieters are encouraged to eat pretzels or popcorn - fat free and fiber, right? But that doesn't work so well for us. Giving our re-routed bodies these simple carbs is dangerous because our bodies have spent years perfect the art of fat storage - slider foods are to the body a great big lottery win.</i><br />
<i> </i><b><i> </i></b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<i>Many patients will mistakenly blame their surgical stomach pouch thinking it has stretched out or is no longer working correctly. However, patients who return to a diet of lean protein and avoid drinking liquids with meals will quickly discover the uncomfortable pouch restriction still occurs bringing feelings of fullness with small servings of food. Continued compliance with the high protein diet eventually leads to weight loss once again. </i><br />
<br />
<i> </i><i> For weight loss surgery patients protein is not always the most comfortable food choice because of the tightness that results following eating. However, for bariatric surgery to work correctly and sustain long-term weight loss and weight maintenance, a high protein diet void of simple processed carbohydrates must be followed consistently.</i><br />
<br />
<b>I am apparently a queen of slurry foods. I read that and though I knew carbs were my issue the ones described; the crackers, pretzels, popcorn , are my crack. Well and Twizzlers which I have not had in over a week thankfully.</b><br />
<br />
<b>The 5 Day Pouch test takes you through the food stages we went through following our RNY in five quick days. In short, it is this:</b><br />
<br />
<b> </b><i> </i><br />
<strong>Days One & Two: Liquid Protein</strong><br />
<i>low-carb <a class="kLink" href="http://www.5daypouchtest.com/plan/theplan.html#" id="KonaLink4" style="font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static; text-decoration: underline !important;"><span style="color: #f26522; font-family: inherit ! important; font-size: inherit ! important; font-weight: inherit ! important; position: static;"><span class="kLink" style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(242, 101, 34); color: rgb(242, 101, 34) ! important; font-family: inherit ! important; font-size: inherit ! important; font-weight: inherit ! important; position: static;">protein </span><span class="kLink" style="background-color: transparent; border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(242, 101, 34); color: rgb(242, 101, 34) ! important; font-family: inherit ! important; font-size: inherit ! important; font-weight: inherit ! important; position: static;">shakes</span></span></a>, broth, clear or cream soups, sugar-free gelatin and pudding.</i><a href="http://www.5daypouchtest.com/plan/days1_2.html"> </a><br />
<strong>Day 3: Soft Protein</strong><br />
<i>canned fish (tuna or salmon) eggs, fresh soft fish (tilapia, sole, orange roughy.</i> <a href="http://www.5daypouchtest.com/plan/day3.html"> </a><br />
<strong>Day 4: Firm Protein </strong><br />
<i>ground meat (turkey, beef, chicken, lamb), shellfish, scallops, lobster, fresh salmon or halibut.</i><br />
<b>Day 5: Solid Protein</b><br />
<i>white meat poultry, beef steak, pork, lamb, wild game</i><br />
<b>My biggest concern with this is the first two days and my mood that might accompany that. Can I work productively while probably feeling irritable? My other huge problem is my hatred of protein shakes. I have NEVER found a protein powder that did not make me want to gag. But I need to. A majority of WLS patients years out of surgery still have 1-2 protein shakes a day.</b><br />
<br />
<b>I have two other major rules I have broken. I am again drinking soda, albeit diet soda and I am not obeying the rules of drinking before and after meals. Essentially, WLS patients should stop drinking 30 minutes before a meal and not drink again until 30 minutes after a meal. My goal for this week is to resolve the liquids problem. The pouch test I plan to start a week from tomorrow as The Brit will be away so I don't have to deal with meals other then the simple crap the kids will eat and what I will need to do.</b><br />
<br />
<b>So what happens after Day 5, you may ask? It says this:</b><br />
<br />
<i>After the 5 Day Pouch Test is when things get exciting. Having successfully broken a carb-cycle, regained a feeling of control over the surgical gastric pouch and possibly losing a few pounds one is ready for re-entry into a compliant way of eating. This means focusing on protein rich meals, observing the liquid restrictions and avoiding starches, particularly processed carbohydrates and slider foods. Three meals a day should be two-thirds protein, one third <a class="kLink" href="http://www.5daypouchtest.com/plan/faq.html#" id="KonaLink17" style="font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static; text-decoration: underline !important;"><span style="color: #f26522; font-family: inherit ! important; font-size: inherit ! important; font-weight: inherit ! important; position: static;"><span class="kLink" style="color: #f26522 !important; font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static;">healthy</span></span></a> carbohydrate in the form of low-glycemic vegetables and fruits. Consumption of whole grains is not forbidden, but should be limited to one serving a day.</i><br />
<br />
<i> </i><br />
<i>If necessary between meal snacks should be protein dense. Natural food protein is great including hard-cooked eggs, lean low-sodium deli meats, and limited servings of nuts or low-fat cheese. In addition, <a class="kLink" href="http://www.5daypouchtest.com/plan/faq.html#" id="KonaLink18" style="font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static; text-decoration: underline !important;"><span style="color: #f26522; font-family: inherit ! important; font-size: inherit ! important; font-weight: inherit ! important; position: static;"><span class="kLink" style="color: #f26522 !important; font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static;">protein </span><span class="kLink" style="color: #f26522 !important; font-family: inherit !important; font-size: inherit !important; font-weight: inherit !important; position: static;">bars</span></span></a> or beverages may be used for between meal supplementation.</i><br />
<br />
<b>I read about one women who lost 100 pounds by doing the Pouch Test and then staying on Day 6 for the next five months, so getting back on track is far from impossible. I need to remember why I have done this. I worked too hard to get the surgery and has a post op to screw it all up now.</b><br />
<br />
<b>So there you go for keeping it real. </b><i><br />
</i><br />
<b> </b> KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-6331191913835946172011-08-02T21:12:00.000-04:002011-08-02T21:12:37.195-04:00Adventures in Ambien<b>I have sleep issues. I have been popping Tylenol PM for the better part of 20 years and the last several months, my insomnia has increased enough that many nights it was three Tylenol and four Melatonin and still I would find myself wide awake at 2:30 AM.</b><br />
<br />
<b>Many months ago, Michael, my GBC, told me he was on Ambien and he loved it. Said he slept like a baby. I considered it but dismissed any thought of pursuing it. Now working full time again, lack of sleep is a big deal, especially since it happens to me a lot. T, who I work with also told me she was on Ambien and having grown weary of feeling so tired all the time, I finally saw my doctor last week to ask about a prescription, which she gave to me.</b><br />
<br />
<b>That night, I got the best night's sleep I have had in months! I was surprised by how quickly it worked though! Tylenol PM, I took an hour before bed in order to feel a little sleepy by the time it was light's out. Ambien takes about 15 minutes to hit full force. In 15 minutes, I can no longer read the words on my Kindle and have to sleep.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>The third night on the drug was following a busy day. We went to the lake on Saturday and had a full day boating and swimming. We left late to come home and did not arrive back at the house till 10:30 PM. After getting the kids up to bed, I took the Ambien and then putzed around downstairs for about ten minutes; putting away some of the stuff from the lake and tidying up. Went upstairs and took out my contacts and washed my face.</b><br />
<br />
<b>Then it all gets fuzzy. The Brit reports that I sat on his side of the bed and tried to put on my pajamas for ten minutes, all the while talking about the people on the love seat in our room who were laughing at me. I went on to insist that I did not want the kids in the room while I was changing. No recollection on my part at all.</b><br />
<br />
<b>Sunday night was uneventful, though The Brit remarked when I came up to bed that he was ready for tonight's show. Then last night, I got into bed with the intention of reading my Kindle until I went to sleep. Apparently, I fell asleep with the Kindle and my glasses down around my face and when The Brit woke me up to tell me to put the Kindle away and go to bed, I argued like a child about not wanting to, held a full conversation with the Couch People and told The Brit where on my body I hid my dollar bills.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>It has been an interesting ride so far but damn, I am sleeping well!</b><br />
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<b>The Genius turned 16 today and per his request, he got a Kindle. At least I have one reader out of the two! </b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-24455307818553773772011-07-26T22:35:00.000-04:002011-07-26T22:35:09.385-04:00Take Time for a Do Over <b><a href="http://weightlossjabber.blogspot.com/2011/07/how-could-you.html">Laura posted this</a> last year and only read it if you don't mind some tears, have tissues handy and own a dog. I use the latter not because I think that people who don't have dogs won't get it, but because though I read it last year and it made me feel undeniably sad, I don't think it brought me to tears. As an animal lover, I hate any and all animal injustice and believe me, I see plenty of injustices every day. I said that because I read Laura's repost of it tonight and cried like an idiot because now I have a dog to associate this with. Like putting a face with a name. I look at my Rhys and know that was his situation and would have been his situation in the end had we or someone else not fallen in love with him. His last family gave him up because a baby was on the way. So Rhys was the first baby but in his case, being a canine made him a throw away to these people. And despite the fact that their ignorance was my gain, it still makes me angry when I think of the situation through the eyes of my dog.</b><br />
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<b>And I see dozens of stories like his and worse every week. Too many unwanted animals and not enough homes; not enough people to take a chance on a do-over dog but instead go to pet shops and breeders so they can start fresh with a puppy. It isn't that I have anything against reputable breeders (and many of them are not reputable so do your homework if you are going to go this route) and the people who chose to use them, but most people do not see what I see. They don't see the little Yorkie whose owner had landlord issues, trembling in the back of a kennel because he is terrified of all the barking and so confused as to what happened to life as he knew it. They don't see the Chow and the Border Collie who have grown up together but due to the current economy, their owner had to give them up and due to the economy, the shelter will probably have to separate them in order to get each one adopted out. They don't see the eager, hopeful year old pup who rushes to the front of her kennel for every person, desperate for affection and attention, or the three year old mixed breed, who passed his assessment with flying colors but two weeks later, the stress of shelter life causes him to snap and he is led from his kennel, no longer adoptable. </b><br />
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<b>These are the sad stories of shelter life. Yes, there are happy stories too, like the purebred who went to his new home this week and as I watched him greet his new family, I teared up; both because he had been saved and also because so many others are not. </b><br />
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<b>I say these things because I want people to understand my passion and for every one abandoned dog, there are five cats with the same story. No kitten should ever have to begin and end their life in a shelter, yet it happens every day to dozens. There will never be enough people to adopt them all, especially when so many refuse to spay and neuter. But for every one person willing to take a chance on a shelter animal, it is one less sad story shelters everywhere have to endure. We are all there for the love of the animals and with faith and hope that our educating the public will make a difference even to one animal.</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYfGDL7chdziEykv5RM5gE9PLsfzOfc5lvq-N6YPp_YjMAO0hTNsz9vhTwWMDPWxO14tA9mcmr5hZyLDCOHN2kvRpHlyM_ikSpAwlq8sjDQ46UJgBogU3fQPyetS5F_3nfWlvi6a3jWYE/s1600/shelter+cats.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYfGDL7chdziEykv5RM5gE9PLsfzOfc5lvq-N6YPp_YjMAO0hTNsz9vhTwWMDPWxO14tA9mcmr5hZyLDCOHN2kvRpHlyM_ikSpAwlq8sjDQ46UJgBogU3fQPyetS5F_3nfWlvi6a3jWYE/s320/shelter+cats.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgT1eSvNQt4YXzT3E-4Cy-7nqckq03gEuprri5fIezV1jpYkGVFYgZetlVYpZqpGWnGV3zlyvJTYHrSs9dRlpyG3PxBkTdsgaD9Yl2aNU920FZRBUuqlm2SU8kLEH0unlZJfTIGsfvgY5w/s1600/sad-shelter-dog2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgT1eSvNQt4YXzT3E-4Cy-7nqckq03gEuprri5fIezV1jpYkGVFYgZetlVYpZqpGWnGV3zlyvJTYHrSs9dRlpyG3PxBkTdsgaD9Yl2aNU920FZRBUuqlm2SU8kLEH0unlZJfTIGsfvgY5w/s320/sad-shelter-dog2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdeusWFZC5_zefSC9yFsc3y1rEWuzvM2R0J3FT6n8ezC8JvfYLtKgfeKaQZsi4enJNXZDR7axsNwUq0xKpliCPOVDrCHSksQbCSuICJghyMJ8ZSUZC7-2pO_ChLuSwsBdEkV_JSZaVQso/s1600/shelter2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdeusWFZC5_zefSC9yFsc3y1rEWuzvM2R0J3FT6n8ezC8JvfYLtKgfeKaQZsi4enJNXZDR7axsNwUq0xKpliCPOVDrCHSksQbCSuICJghyMJ8ZSUZC7-2pO_ChLuSwsBdEkV_JSZaVQso/s320/shelter2.jpg" width="213" /></a></div><b> These faces are the reality of too many animals and too many shelter employees and volunteers. We fight for them every day and for every person who takes a chance on an animal who desperately needs that chance, we add one more person or family to those more than willing to educate others to the joy their do over pet has brought to them. </b><br />
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<b>In many cases, we have to wonder who really rescued who. </b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-30915295297856566542011-07-25T22:42:00.000-04:002011-07-25T22:42:53.663-04:00Another Trip Around the Sun<b>Yesterday was my 45th birthday and it was a fantabulous day. Unlike some, I do not need presents or a big party to make it a great birthday. In fact, for me, yesterday was about as good as it gets.</b><br />
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<b>I only last week learned that we have something called <a href="http://www.visitshenandoah.com/">Shenandoah National Forest</a> pretty much in our backyard. An hour and twenty minutes from home, it is a one hundred mile drive one way through some of the most beautiful country I have ever seen on the East coast. Breathtaking views, deer a-plenty and bear sightings as well, it was just awesome. It was just me, The Brit, the kids and my dog, but it was a damn near perfect day. The humidity here at home has been rough the last week but in the mountains, the temps dropped to the mid-seventies, so it was windows down, fresh mountain air blowing through the hair and breathing in the smells of nature. </b><br />
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<b>We drove the whole Skyline Drive, which is 100 miles and that took us to about 4:00. Well, we had lunch and the boys and I hiked six tenths of a mile down to a waterfall (and then all uphill on the way back but I did it and felt great for the experience). So at 4:00, we elected that instead of grabbing the highway home, we would just turn around and drive the Skyline Drive back. As twilight descended, even more wildlife ventured out, and our ride back was full of deer sighting; does and fawns and even some young bucks with velvet still covering their antlers, as well as an additional black bear sighting.</b><br />
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<b>It was beautiful and breathtaking and we are doing it again in two weeks and are also planning a tour in the fall when the leaves are brilliant colors.</b><br />
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<b>Don't give me cities. My preference is always nature. Beautiful and peaceful it makes me wonder how anyone can doubt the existence of God (and that is not a call for snarky remarks. I don't bash anyone else's beliefs, so leave mine the hell alone) when I am watching a sky change colors after a storm or just listening to the sound of waves crashing onto the sand. It's like the story of the watchmaker. If you find a beautiful pocket watch on a log in the middle of the woods, you cannot prove that someone made it. You cannot see the watchmaker, yet you know he exists. For me, the same is true of creation. It didn't just "happen". Someone took the time to design it and in all its glory, it is infinitely glorious.</b><br />
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<b>I'll show you pics when I get then downloaded. Maybe even tomorrow.</b><br />
<b> </b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-75492956957597645372011-07-06T21:37:00.001-04:002011-07-06T21:37:01.064-04:00The Plan<b>I have come to the conclusion that I need a plan to not weight 300 plus pounds again. Though I have not gone up any clothing sizes (yet) things are a bit snug. The reason? Working full time and not having the time to go to the gym. I am walking many nights but compared to the kinds of workouts I was doing before, walking is not cutting it. The gym at night is rough due to having to feed people and animals and grocery shopping and church. There is always something in the way.</b><br />
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<b>I had a long chat tonight with an old friend from the old church and she told me she had been hitting the Y at 5:00 am Monday through Friday. I can do this. Last summer, I was getting up at 5:00 to run before work, so surely I can get up to hit the Y by 5:00 or 5:30. Then I can shower there and head to work. It will require a little more planning but totally doable and probably the very best solution. The Brit will be getting The Lawyer up for school come August and I can call to walk up The Genius. He gets himself out the door anyway. These days I head up to bed by 10:30 anyway and the fact remains that I know working out in the manner my body used to work out, is going to increase my energy anyway.</b><br />
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<b>It has been a difficult adjustment to go back to work full time but I cannot use it as an excuse to gain weight. I must simply rearrange my life a little to make things work for me.</b><br />
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<b></b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-91830818118381319152011-07-05T21:37:00.000-04:002011-07-05T21:37:31.638-04:00Why I Love Them<b>Life at a shelter is often difficult for the employees as well. Twice in two weeks, one of the kittens I have been loving on has died. When the first little fur ball passed away, I felt as if my heart was being ripped from my chest. T, one of my favorite co-workers, told me that was why she kept her distance from the animals. I pondered this long and hard and came to the realization that no matter how hard it can be to lose them, to not love them is simply not an option.</b><br />
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<b>How can I not shower them with a little love and a little cuddle when for whatever reason their mamas have vanished and they have placed into a cage surrounded by dozens of other crying kitties? How can I not in some small way bring some small comfort to one of God's little furry creations? No, not getting close is simply not an option for me.</b><br />
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<b>No matter how hard it can be, I am so thankful to be working there. I love being able to help animals (who I regard in higher standard than most people) in any way. I find it satisfying and so worthwhile. Not always easy but nothing worthwhile ever is.</b><br />
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<b>I found this on Facebook a week or two ago and I wanted to share as I love it. I think it is true of most animals but especially of dogs:</b><br />
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<tr><td><span style="color: #330000; font-family: verdana,arial,helvetica; font-size: x-small;"><b>Dogs Ten Commandments</b></span></td> </tr>
<tr> <td rowspan="6"><span style="color: #333300; font-family: verdana,arial,helvetica; font-size: x-small;">1. My life is likely to last 10 to 15 years - any separation from you will be very painful.<br />
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2. Give me time to understand what you want of me.<br />
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3. Place your trust in me - it is crucial for my well being.<br />
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4. Don't be angry with me for long and don't lock me up as punishment...You have your work, your friends, your entertainment...<br />
<b>I HAVE ONLY YOU!</b><br />
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5. Talk to me. Even if I don't understand your words, I understand your voice when you're speaking to me.<br />
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6. Be aware that however you treat me, I'll NEVER forget it.<br />
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7. Before you hit me, remember that I have teeth that could easily crush the bones in your hands but I choose NOT to bite YOU.<br />
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8. Before you scold me for being lazy or uncooperative, ask yourself if something might be bothering me. Perhaps I'm not getting the right food, I've been out in the sun too long or my heart may be getting old and weak.<br />
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9. Take care of me when I get old. You too will grow old.<br />
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10. Go with me on difficult journeys. Never say, "I can't bear to watch it" or "Let it happen in my absence." Everything is easier for ME if you are there. Remember that I love you.</span></td> </tr>
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</tbody></table><b> </b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-60254320219889123502011-06-19T17:44:00.000-04:002011-06-19T17:44:18.871-04:00Seriously?I have not blogged in ten days? Actually, I am only blogging now because I am bored out of my skull and have the dog tied to my ankle, literally. Friends of friends have written an independent film in which I am playing a small part and then we offered our home for them to film two outside scenes. They have been here since 9:00 am and it is now 5:32 and they are on the last scene which is being filmed on the front porch. As the dog is rather curious I cannot have him running the house and working his way into the film by breathing on the front door so here we are in the computer room blogging with his leash around my ankle.<br />
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This weekend was uneventful really. Yesterday we ran some errands that consisted of The Brit's Father's Day gift and running my mom around to a few places so I could get off her shit list as she has not seen me too much lately. Working full time will do that and then this past week was VBS at the church and I was playing a small part each night so it was a run,run, run kinda week, as in get off work, have 45 free (LMAO...free if you call vacuuming, sorting out dinner and changing clothes free time) minutes before hauling ass to church till 8:45. But I will say that it was the most fun I have ever had at a VBS. Those of you who have been following me for some time know how much I hated it at the old church because I had to co-run it, I already worked there so that meant more of my day VBS week was spent at the church then at home, and then more often than not, we would have 6 kids show up. This past week, I did not run anything, we had several dozen kids, it was extremely well run and the kids had a fab time. I will gladly help again next year even though it makes for a hectic week.<br />
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I think part of the reason I have not been blogging so much is that life is just so busy but it is mostly mundane. Nothing extraordinary is happening despite the fact that I am crazy busy. Yesterday during our errand running, I bargain shopped very well. Got a yard sale kitty tower for $20 and a wooden filing cabinet for $15. Cannot beat that. In the last few days I have broken my own mold and elected to buy some dresses to wear to work during the hot summer months. Those of you who know me well know I am not a dress up girl, but pants get hot during the summer. I have purchased four dresses for about $25. Again, cannot beat it. I love me some second hand bargain shopping. Just because it belonged to someone else does not mean it is not in perfect condition and completely washable. It is my contribution to being green.<br />
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I think I am ready to have an extraordinary day. Will someone please get on that?KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-87362951984443812682011-06-09T21:38:00.000-04:002011-06-09T21:38:16.588-04:00Don't Ya'll Faint Now<b>Yeah, two in two days! Who would have thought?</b> <b>Jimnotmike threw down the gauntlet after all so I guess I need to try to get back on the ball at least a wee bit. No promises but I am trying.</b><br />
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<b>Today has been one of those days I have been in awe of. Nothing extraordinary happened, but it was just a good day. Work was busy as we have a huge event Saturday night (I do not have to be there but am very involved in the prep work), so my day was spent on laminating and creating signs, working on silent auction items, helping B, my work husband who is head of Events, and running errands. B and I went off to lunch together and there has been lots of camaraderie in my little department which is a welcome change from all the kitten sadness that will eat me alive if I allow it to. It's just nice. My boss thanks me on a daily basis for my work, T, the head Admin, jokes and carries on with me all day which is great fun, B and I get along famously and my least favorite staff person just gave her notice.</b><br />
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<b>Tonight, The Brit and I went out to dinner with another couple we are friends with, Emily and Dave, and my church gals, who I adore. We had some wine, chatted and laughed for two hours and I just again marveled at the way God works. In an odd way, I thank Him for the horrible things that happened at the old church because they caused me to finally leave a place I was not being fulfilled. Though it was one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do, when I think of how it all turned out, I am just amazed. When I think that I could still be at that old church, fighting to keep it together and not getting anything back spiritually, I almost shudder. I cannot imagine still being somewhere that is close to dead now that I am a part of something that is on fire. Sometimes our blessings come in unexpected and unwanted at the time packages.</b><br />
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<b>This weekend we are heading out for the day Saturday, potentially to a dog peach near Annapolis. I still adore my pup and I want him to have some doggie fun on the weekends. He loves other dogs so I try to find him some playmates over the weekends. Next week starts VBS so I will be busy every night. Yes, I hated VBS at the old church but I do not have to run this one and I am only playing a part in the drama each night. Bring it!</b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-50071680726314880502011-06-08T21:11:00.001-04:002011-07-28T21:31:02.818-04:00My Non-Existent Blog<b>Yeah yeah yeah. I know. I suck. If someone could create another eight hours in a day for me or better yet, a pill that enabled me to only need one hour's sleep a night, I'd get a lot more done. </b><br />
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<b>Work has been rough lately. Really rough. It is not uncommon to walk around a corner to see another employee in tears or to hear two employees who are really good friends, exchanging angry words. Fuses are short and emotions are running high. We are all there because of our love for animals and we are in the heat of kitten season and it sucks. </b><br />
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<b>Kitten season means that cats are out there producing at alarming rates because people are irresponsible and don't have their cats spayed or neutered and then they let them outside. Those with male cats probably figure that their tomcat is not going to bring home any kittens and that would be correct but someone is finding them and bringing them to our door. Little balls of sweet fluff who are unwanted in the world and who were brought into the world due to human irresponsibility. It sickens me. </b><br />
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<b>The shelter is completely FULL right now which essentially means that anything that comes in right now is given a death sentence. 71 animals were put down in one day this week, simply because we are out of room and I would bet that the majority of that number were feline. Each afternoon on break, I go back to the feline holding room, find a little kitten that fits in the palm of my hand and take it back to my desk to love on for 15 minutes and when I take it back to the cage I have no idea if I will see it tomorrow. This is the reality of shelters during kitten season.</b><br />
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<b>Is this post doom and gloom? Yeah, probably, but it is a hard time for us right now. </b><br />
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<b>Yet there are happy moments too. Yesterday, The Genius was out walking the dog before I left for work and he called me from his cell phone, announcing he had found a "puppy" and no one was around. I drove a few blocks over to meet him and the "puppy" was actually an elderly chihuahua. I put the little girl in the back of my car where she sat politely for the ride into work. Checking her out once we arrived, we found her nails had been recently trimmed and she smelled as if she had been recently bathed, but she was off the streets and not in any danger of being hit by a car or worse.</b><br />
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<b>By that afternoon a crying elderly lady was at the shelter, so grateful that her beloved companion had been found and rescued. The dog, who was actually 16 years old with a heart condition, had apparently slipped out when her husband had left for work, but now she was back safe and sound with her human mama.</b><br />
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<b>These are the good stories and the reason I love my job. I know we are working for the greater good, but at times it is so painful. We see the stupidity of people firsthand; their lack of caring and their inability to comprehend that their decisions dictate a horrible fate to a lesser but in my opinion, far more superior species. </b><br />
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<b>We do the best we can. If only the general public would strive to do better then maybe one day kitten season could cease to exist.</b><br />
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<b>Oh and Strat, I dunno. I have thought about writing THAT book before but am afraid they will find out and sue me for some reason...or stone me. </b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-64746893823292811722011-05-26T22:16:00.000-04:002011-05-26T22:16:49.198-04:00This Makes My Blood BoilA Shady Grove couple found guilty in April of abusing nearly 80 farm animals have been cited again, now for the alleged abuse of four dogs at their home.<br />
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A total of 14 animal cruelty citations were filed against Ralph and Susan Fries, said Franklin County Humane Society Police Officer Floyd "Buck" Hessler.<br />
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They have not yet entered a plea with Magisterial District Judge Duane Cunningham.<br />
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The dogs, which Hessler described as "husky-type," were seized April 23 from the couple's residence at 1704 Buchanan Trail East. Hessler said he acquired a warrant to go to the home after a neighbor contacted him about the conditions there.<br />
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All four dogs, one male and three females, are currently being held at Cumberland Valley Animal Shelter, Chambersburg.<br />
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Three of the dogs had medical issues when they were seized, Hessler said.<br />
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The Frieses are cited for not providing veterinary care to the male dog, which allegedly had severe infections in both ears. After the dog was seized, a veterinarian prescribed medication for the infections.<br />
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"The dog was in severe pain because this was not taken care of by a vet," Hessler wrote in the citation.<br />
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Two of the female dogs exhibited a "severe skin condition," according to Hessler. Medicine was prescribed for both dogs after they were seized.<br />
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Hessler's citations allege that he found the dogs living in unsanitary conditions. He said they were forced to live in contact with their own feces and urine.<br />
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It appeared that the dogs, all adults, were kept in small cages in one room of the house "for hours at a time" whenever they were brought inside, Hessler said.<br />
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The cages were too small for the dogs to stand or turn freely, Hessler said. Urine and clumps of fur were "all over the floor" of that room, according to one citation.<br />
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The strong smell of ammonia from urine inside the house "took your breath away," according to another citation.<br />
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In an outdoor kennel behind the garage, Hessler wrote that he saw dogs "walking and standing in the mess" of feces that had not been cleaned out.<br />
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One citation alleges that shelter in the outdoor kennel was inadequate, since there were no dog houses "to protect the dogs from weather conditions rain, snow, cold, heat, wind."<br />
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Another citation alleges that the dogs were not properly groomed, and had long toenails and clumps of fur falling out due to a lack of brushing.<br />
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Hessler said the dogs were apparently being fed and provided with water.<br />
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Ralph and Susan Fries each face seven summary citations for the alleged neglect of the four dogs.<br />
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Hessler said that if the couple is found guilty, he intends to ask for the maximum fine of $750 on each citation. He is also asking that they permanently surrender the dogs and pay restitution for veterinary, grooming and kennel fees.<br />
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He said the total cost of caring for the seized dogs is not yet known.<br />
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If they are found guilty, Hessler wants the Frieses to be prevented from owning any animals during a court-ordered probationary period.<br />
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While the law allows higher-level charges for repeat animal cruelty offenders, Hessler said he couldn't seek such charges in this instance, because the dogs were seized before the Fries' were found guilty of a previous set of violations.<br />
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On April 28, Ralph and Susan Fries were <a href="http://www.pet-abuse.com/cases/16338/PA/US/">found guilty of 14 citations for the mistreatment of 70 goats, seven donkeys, a horse and a pony kept on a farm in St. Thomas</a>.<br />
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Magisterial District Judge David Hawbaker ordered them to pay court costs and fines of $100 for each citation. Those animals remain in the care of a farm at an undisclosed location, Hessler said Thursday.<br />
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Read more: <a href="http://www.pet-abuse.com/cases/16339/PA/US/#ixzz1NVyyLuNK" style="color: #003399;">Pet-Abuse.Com - Animal Abuse Case Details: Dogs neglected in home - Shady Grove, PA (US)</a> <a href="http://www.pet-abuse.com/cases/16339/PA/US/#ixzz1NVyyLuNK" style="color: #003399;">http://www.pet-abuse.com/cases/16339/PA/US/#ixzz1NVyyLuNK</a></div><div style="background-color: transparent; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"><br />
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</div><div style="background-color: transparent; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">So not only have these asshats been in trouble with animal cruelty charges before, but now they keep freaking appealing while their dogs SIT IN A SHELTER. The dogs have been in the shelter for a year and if these idiots keep appealing the dogs could be in the shelter for years more. If these people ever got these dogs back, the poor dogs would be so screwed up from the incredible stress of shelter life that they would probably wind up right back there again. DO THE RIGHT THING. Admit you screwed up, stop appealing and allow these poor animals to be adopted so they stand a chance.</div><div style="background-color: transparent; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"><br />
</div><div style="background-color: transparent; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">The laws for animal rights, as I am learning, are downright shameful.</div>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-82848920435204219462011-05-24T20:21:00.000-04:002011-05-24T20:21:02.080-04:00Ever Have One of Those Lives?<b>I am finding myself beyond frustrated. Most days (not today) I love my job and I don't mind working full time, BUT everything else is so much more complicated. Part of it is my control freak ways. My house needs vacuumed desperately and it BOTHERS ME. I am putting on some weight and it BOTHERS ME. Basically, it makes me feel like shit. I don't feel as good as I did when I was working out regularly. My kids are at asshat ages and it BOTHERS ME. I hate that they are here alone so much because The Genius cannot be trusted. I feel helpless in my own life and I have little to no idea what to do about any of it. </b><br />
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<b>Getting to the gym means the possibility of pissing off people. But the fact is, if I get a handle on my exercise again, I may feel better in all the other aspects of my life. Once a week kickboxing and walking the dog are not cutting it for me. I felt strong in almost every aspect of my life when my workouts were regular. My patience level was better. I was not freaking exhausted ALL THE TIME. I accept the fact that I am getting older and maybe being more tired is normal, but not this desire to nap half the freaking afternoon.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>I love my dog, but at times it is hard to have him at work everyday especially now in the hotter months. I could otherwise get a few things accomplished on my lunch hour. Granted, when the kids are out of school, he will be staying home at least part of the time with them. They need to learn the responsibility.</b><br />
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<b>So I need a PLAN. I cannot keep going this way. It is making me crazy. There are days when I feel like I am on the verge of tears all day long just because I hate the helpless feeling of not being in control of my life. </b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>So there are options for the gym.</b><br />
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<b>I love my Wednesday night service at church but I am considering giving it up to go workout and then going back to the church for 8:00 rehearsal. I can either get to the Y on a Sunday or I need to switch my grocery day so I can workout on Monday. I have stuff here at home to work out but every time I attempt it, I am inundated with children and questions and mocking about what I am doing. Plus, my resources are limited here and with it being the onset of summer, we don't have central air and I am not about working out in a sauna. </b><br />
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<b>I don't care if I go to the gym before or after dinner. Either works. I just need to get there...though it is harder to leave to do it once I am home, but I will just make myself do it. I think my eating took a nose dive when the church blew up (and incidentally, more people are leaving) and I have not regained control. I am still a size 18 but things are not as roomy as they once were and if I do not intervene, I will not stay an 18.</b><br />
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<b>If this plan doesn't work (and when The Brit travels I am not sure at all of how it can work) something has to give. The way I feel right now this moment cannot continue.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>Just sayin'</b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-48530604165878696942011-05-15T19:19:00.000-04:002011-05-15T19:19:50.626-04:00I do not understand the male species........AT ALL.<br />
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<br />
<br />
They set things on fire, they lie, cheat and steal, they find farts hysterical, love cartoon movies, have an answer for everything, always think they are right and can turn the tables on you in the midst of any argument where you have been wronged. I love them, but I just don't get them. Not even a teeny, tiny bit.<br />
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And with that being said, please let me say that single moms....you have my absolute respect. I have had a big enough dose of single parenting lately to know that I salute those of you who do this every single day of your lives. I hate it. I hate it even more working full time. I love, love, love my job, but trying to single parent around nine hours a day? Not fun at all.<br />
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Last week The Lawyer set fire to a trash can outside from a cigarette butt my sister in law left in the outside ashtray. He decided he wanted to know what would happen if he set fire to a plastic bag that was in the trash can. Well, he found out. It melted the trash can. Thankfully, a neighbor came down to help put it out and then his wife proceeded to make me feel like a terrible mother, offering to let The Lawyer be in her daycare for an hour a day for $20 a week because "he is obviously lonely and trying to get attention." Gimme a break-he is home for an hour and fifteen minutes before I get here; he was just being a boy and I kicked his butt for it.<br />
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The second part of The Genius story is that he did not just drop out of Credit Recovery because of track. Noooo...he dropped out of track too so he could walk to his friend's house in the west end of town every day when he was "at practice." So he is currently under a microscope and he is grounded from his phone and life until he passes this class and gets his Biology grade up to at least a 75% which is what he needs to pass for the year.<br />
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The Lawyer fried his phone in the bathtub because he talks to his great grandma on the phone at bath time so it was just waiting to happen. He, of course, blamed it on the cat. Go figure.<br />
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The Brit has been gone more than he has been home, thus my salute to single moms. I don't think anyone has any idea of what we do and what we have to deal with when we are on our own. There is no down time. By the time the kids are in bed, the lunches are packed, the house is semi-cleanish, and the pets are taken care of, we are too freakin' exhausted to do anything more than go to bed so we can wake up and do it all over again. Men often come home and when they walk in the door, they are done for the day. They sit down to dinner and move from there to the television. This is not my life. Not when there are meals for the next day to think of, laundry to do, dishes to deal with (the men in my house think we have gnomes who do the cups and spoons they just lay in the sink when they are finished...a huge pet peeve of mine. It seems to just be an assumption that I will do them. I mean, how else will they get done?), grocery shopping to do, yard work, etc. All the stuff that HAS to be done.<br />
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I tried not to complain about any of this when I was 20 hours a week, but it is harder to keep my thoughts to myself at 40 hours a week. I just wish there was more help.<br />
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Next week is Tod's show "1776" and I am looking forward to a night out...again with my kids...but with some friends as well.<br />
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The dog is the light of my life at the moment. He is a constant companion who does not argue with me. His name should have been Houdini as we cannot seem to confine him to the computer room to go anywhere. He is left alone VERY rarely. He has so far eaten though a gate, knocked one over and crawled under another. Yesterday, The Brit cut a door off and put it on hinges to keep him in there but today when the kids and I went to church, he jumped the door. Nothing funnier though than pulling up in front of the house and seeing his handsome head pop up from where he is laying in front of the door. Too cute and he has so far not been destructive so I guess we will give him the downstairs on a test run for Tod's show!<br />
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Hoping my week is uneventful as that would be a great chance of venue for me!<br />
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/rantKJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-39845063282208644422011-05-01T21:58:00.000-04:002011-05-01T21:58:32.504-04:00Interesting Weekend<b>So yesterday we went to breakfast and ran into the whole old church crowd. Several said good morning, Strat's dad waved though her mother would not look at me, and The Puppet Master's wife came back and hugged us both. Not sure what the hell that is all about. </b><br />
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<b>The rest of the day was yard work, which I love, and a haircut at yet another new salon: Bella Salon and Spa. A bit pricier than what I am used to, but a great haircut in a professional atmosphere. My last cut was done by someone else in my former "new salon" and she screwed up the stacking in the back and after my appointment, the girls were all spinning their boyfriends around in their chairs and flipping each other off, etc. Now, I am no saint but when I am paying for a service after a long day at work, I do not wish to see children playing adults and not succeeding, ergo Bella Salon. Apparently, I am getting old.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>Today was Kirk and Brent's graduation from Eastern Mennonite University and I was a little apprehensive about going due to folks from the old church who were my friends but I had not heard from since I left my job out there. I almost didn't go, but Kirk has been such a good friend of mine for a long time so I went and had a really good day other than it being cold and rainy and the graduation being outside! But it was fun and good to be around everyone again.</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLQyxtXlsW_xuOjynB7AOwjy6WDMJxUvQ682oTMsG1AYuc5mt3YUu2ivuNwqDsjfKK6GdLg57GWYYljlBs_-_EnxmxITiMPzZebQbb9YuMCy19KCpSY7Ac-JQx9SxiOxKxVGLPgGxS6N8/s1600/230822_10150162682791344_642046343_6881611_4962139_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLQyxtXlsW_xuOjynB7AOwjy6WDMJxUvQ682oTMsG1AYuc5mt3YUu2ivuNwqDsjfKK6GdLg57GWYYljlBs_-_EnxmxITiMPzZebQbb9YuMCy19KCpSY7Ac-JQx9SxiOxKxVGLPgGxS6N8/s400/230822_10150162682791344_642046343_6881611_4962139_n.jpg" width="238" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE-nP1M2tJeEUjuDS6_OOv4Tgdyhqlq1A9ykfIrqyIimhtO1rEeoCAL8QJ86IbXmHZ2_xPn4TyRUhVg_Ug_DErKfn-UktyQNKwUevuNlnulaMcl-vN_RDuS-wc7KtN7s0ouVxkku8JmMk/s1600/225675_10150162685296344_642046343_6881638_6907913_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE-nP1M2tJeEUjuDS6_OOv4Tgdyhqlq1A9ykfIrqyIimhtO1rEeoCAL8QJ86IbXmHZ2_xPn4TyRUhVg_Ug_DErKfn-UktyQNKwUevuNlnulaMcl-vN_RDuS-wc7KtN7s0ouVxkku8JmMk/s400/225675_10150162685296344_642046343_6881638_6907913_n.jpg" width="238" /></a></div><b>So a good day.</b><br />
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<b>My friend Renee from California is running an experiment this week about us girls taking care of ourselves. Our assignment for tonight, the first night, is to gauge on a scale from 1-10 how we were/are feeling about tomorrow at 8:00 tonight. I gauged myself at a 5 mainly because I was and am tired from the long drive today and being out in the chill and rain. Then before bed, I have to sit cross legged on the floor and take five deep breaths. The experiment will progress this week and I will try to blog to keep you all informed.</b><br />
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<b>Still in love with my dog. He is a total love bug and so cute.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidGOzxYBWCiQBtGSQNQGZ7A41ItBgF-Z41GNMwjRVZgQ9CaDVCHYoYWGu6JZ5XEHY2EieE2AAvIK8E6jfeT-TbS1Z1l5PK_mO1EfGAph1ZtSD3_exqdJSRRawAm1VTiUtMjqerwdKaSYU/s1600/IMG_3490.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidGOzxYBWCiQBtGSQNQGZ7A41ItBgF-Z41GNMwjRVZgQ9CaDVCHYoYWGu6JZ5XEHY2EieE2AAvIK8E6jfeT-TbS1Z1l5PK_mO1EfGAph1ZtSD3_exqdJSRRawAm1VTiUtMjqerwdKaSYU/s320/IMG_3490.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b> </b><br />
<b>I mean, who in their right mind can resist this face?</b>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-84905137778844784182011-04-23T20:22:00.000-04:002011-04-23T20:22:55.570-04:00<b>Okay, I have been waiting to say this....Jimnotmike, you know I love you but a husband and a dog and a 60 hour a week job does not not equal a teenager and a tween, five cats, a dog, a guinea pig, living with all straight men and ain't none of them tidy in the least, a 40 hour a week job I am still adjusting to after five years of 20 hours a week and lemme tell you something else...there isn't any bed turning down service here nor a chocolate on my pillow!</b><br />
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<b>Whew. I feel better now. Trust me, I will trade you for a week and you will so want your life back! </b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>But all in all, life is good for the most part. The dog is settling in, not without challenges. Today, we had to leave him alone for about 4 hours and please know that we rarely have to leave him alone for very long as he goes to work with me! So we left him in the computer room so we could close the doors on one side and put up a child gate on the other door, much like this one:</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhS_UiK2P_UKmwhMTl9ktQn4cnLlYG7tmhGFMEZ_8Pox4wd9uwzb087ZG0kU8bNx9OpiudNxNpSw6CCf99oFdb1k7Nl4BMz66m-HLHndASGITQ6GKfq_wnhd1bg6QU0GYTN5bu7VzFktnY/s1600/Child-Pet_Gate_Adjustable.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="188" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhS_UiK2P_UKmwhMTl9ktQn4cnLlYG7tmhGFMEZ_8Pox4wd9uwzb087ZG0kU8bNx9OpiudNxNpSw6CCf99oFdb1k7Nl4BMz66m-HLHndASGITQ6GKfq_wnhd1bg6QU0GYTN5bu7VzFktnY/s320/Child-Pet_Gate_Adjustable.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b> I went to training for work and The Brit and The Lawyer went to church for an Easter egg hunt. The Genius was at his grandmother's house. When The Brit and The Laywer got home, Rhys met them at the door. Hmmmm...interesting. In the hallway was an empty Kleenex box. Also interesting. They came through the kitchen to the door that had been blocked with the child gate....and The Wonder Dog had chewed through one side of it in order to succeed in his escape. From there there, he had a whale of a time shredding kleenex and paper towels in the dining room . I was most thankful they got home first and had to clean up the mess.</b><br />
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<b>Rhys has definite separation anxiety but of course, we don't know his story before he came to us. His mouthing issue has improved a lot and is rarely an issue already. Thanks to my bosses wife and her harness recommendation, walking him is much easier now. The cats are doing a tiny bit better...venturing out here and there, but Jonah is still quite vocal about his unhappiness at the dog's presence. So we are all adjusting but for me, he is now part of the family and I adore him.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>I am struggling with a few pounds I need to still lose and it is driving me insane. Finding time and energy to work out while working full-time is hard. I get off work and still have dinner to get or kids to get home to as I am single parenting a lot, and a house to keep clean (with minimal help from the males), lunches to pack, etc. Many nights I am not relaxing until 8:30 or later and then bedtime is 11:00 or a bit earlier as the week progresses . I was walking with Rhys and gearing up to start running again but Thursday night I sprained the hell out of my ankle. We're talking that it looked like a golf ball was attached to the side of it. It is slowly improving and was pretty good this morning but the more I was on it today, the more uncomfortable it became again. So this will possibly and probably mean no kickboxing this week as I'm not sure the ankle will be able to tolerate it as it is a nasty sprain. So I am sitting on my ass eight hours a day instead of four, and having problems finding workout time! What is the solution? I can't get up earlier to go to the gym due to having to get the kids off to school and of course, the dog comes to work with me but can't come to the Y with me in the morning. I had a pre-dog plan of getting up really early a few days in the summer to hit the Y before work and just shower there and leave for work. If my kids would learn some responsibility with the dog, this could still be a option but so far, they are kind of sucking at being responsible. The only time Rhys has an accident in the house is when the kids are in charge of his potty schedule, despite the fact that I leave them the schedule in writing. *sigh*</b><br />
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<b>So though I have sucked at updating here, let me see how many of you are still out there reading. Two questions:</b><br />
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<i><b> What is your best tip for leaving a dog at home alone?</b></i><br />
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<i><b>And how do you fit in exercise with your full time schedule?</b></i>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1942726675947703213.post-20769765379003433822011-04-11T21:47:00.000-04:002011-04-11T21:47:33.729-04:00Okay, Okay<b>So forty hour a week job, church activity, husband on the road at least every other week, two kids, house, five pissed off cats and one new dog who nips when he gets wound up and ya'll wonder where I've been? Can't imagine.</b><br />
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<b>Things are going pretty well with Rhys though a few bad habits are being uncovered. He does get wound up and mouthy, as they call it, and I am trying to break it. Asking around to people who have been there and am hoping to get with my big bosses wife to ask her. Pat Miller has written a few books on dog training, five I believe, and has traveled to places such as Australia to teach dog training. She also has a business and website called <a href="http://www.peaceablepaws.com/">Peaceable Paws</a>, so check her out. Anyway, she is teaching a class at work this week so I am hoping to tag her as well for advice on Cutie McNippy. Rhys is a great dog 95% of the time but there is a lot of puppy still in him. According to my Executive Director, about 3 or 4 years of it.</b><br />
<b> </b><br />
<b>At work, Rhys is an angel. He plays with his toys and dozes and at lunch we take about a 40 minute walk. He knows "Sit" and "Down" though at times will play a stubborn card and not want to do it, though I wait until he does, even if I have to push his rump down to achieve it. The cats still hate him though a few of them are starting to stick up for themselves. Micah spends most of the evening hiding though I believe he comes out during the day when Rhys is at work. I feel guilty about this because they were my first babies but everyone keeps telling me if takes about a month for things between the cats and dog to calm down. </b><br />
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<b>We took him on Saturday to <a href="http://thedawgwash.com/">Central Dawgma and the Dawg Wash</a> which is a car wash for your dog. I plan to bathe him myself most of the time but it was fun outing for us and Rhys was very well behaved for the bath.</b><br />
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<b>In non-dog news, The Genius has a girlfriend. She is a year older than he is and so far I really like her. I just have to be careful about the possibility of him sneaking off to see her. Last night he told me she wanted him to meet her at 4:00. I reminded him he had track practice and I know had that not come up, he would have ditched practice. So we had the conversation about doing the right thing. I am not sure I am ready for dating but the choice is not mine really. Ugh.</b><br />
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<b><br />
Work is still good but I am so busy right now. Our Spring mailers are coming in with a vengeance which is good, but I have about 100 letters to do at this point. I am also getting things ready for a Volunteer Appreciation dinner on Wednesday and for a complete system conversion. I went from looking for things to do a few weeks ago to now knowing how in the hell I am going to get it all done.</b><br />
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<b>And I think I am coming down with another cold...which I really don't have time for. I'll try to update more regularly but time gets away from me. If someone would like to take my kids once or twice a week, I should be able to be more timely ;)</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGYJ-x7fm4A0tQQfSPwmLMlhfc0HuDnDykmN1P_OoHGUrFLiiiJb_8GdS6ebEC0VhZcu5F3DxzttNzT-Go0vcqlC10JtZXDWPKAt41imAB-awLqVpOcPGiNvN4sHc1PucSxE4HaYx8XKo/s1600/rhys.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGYJ-x7fm4A0tQQfSPwmLMlhfc0HuDnDykmN1P_OoHGUrFLiiiJb_8GdS6ebEC0VhZcu5F3DxzttNzT-Go0vcqlC10JtZXDWPKAt41imAB-awLqVpOcPGiNvN4sHc1PucSxE4HaYx8XKo/s320/rhys.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>KJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14874769369160385196noreply@blogger.com1