One last time

Okay, I am going to address this once and only once and then I am moving on.



The past week, this blog has been exploited and not used for its intended purpose.  The purpose of this journal is for me to stay in touch with family and friends and for me to journal about my life, and my feelings about my life.  End of sentence.  This blog has been in existence for over a year and has experienced no issues until lately.



From what I can best piece together, I emailed a question to someone that I consider a friend who I do not usually email.  At the bottom of my emails is my blog address, so the fact that the blog got out there was an innocent mistake on my part, but from that moment on, the fault of anyone's wounded feelings or misplaced anger is not mine.  If this blog was forwarded to the folks who have started their own church, that was a decision made by someone else.  If the purpose was simply to stir up the pot once more, then people succeeded in doing that.  Whether that was the right or wrong thing to do is not for me to say.



I don't really see any other reason for forwarding this blog address other than to stir things up.  If people were using the blog for its intended purpose all of a sudden, then why not just pick up the phone and call me to see how I am and how my family is.  No, that was not the case.  The purpose of passing on my feelings to those who do not agree (there's a shocker, now right?  We are all aware of the fact that we don't agree or we would all still be worshiping in the same building.) was to get people riled up because I wrote about things from my perspective. 



I pay for this domain name and for this space to use as my journal.  So, I own it.  It is mine, so if you are going to flame me in my "house" so to speak, you can probably expect me to defend it.  I would venture to say that if I walked into your house and started spewing out insults, you'd do the same, as you should.  My feelings are mine and this domain is mine.  It seems simple enough.



In eight months, I have not mentioned the split in the church until someone who shall remain nameless, decided to drudge up an eight month old entry and take issue with it.  Maybe it's just me, but that seems a little nuts.  They decided to take issue with the feelings I was working out in my journal about a healing service.  A healing service did stir things up for me and I worked through my issues here, on my property.  I went back to read that entry after receiving the flaming comment, and took note that I did not call anyone names nor insult anyone.  I was trying to work out what the purpose was of a unity service, if unity was only the intent one way.  When I mentioned the word "hypocrisy", the sentence began with "From my point of view".  I was not slanderous nor judgmental.  I simply spoke of how things looked from my side.  When I stated at the end of that entry that " I want to be able, with a clear heart, to wish them all the best and every blessing in their new church." I meant that and now am able to feel just that and have been feeling it for the better part of eight months.  The healing service did indeed help me heal, though I was unsure if it was possible to begin with.  By God's grace, that's what happened.



I feel I blogged responsibly about my feelings and I take a great deal of effort to not mention names in here, other than first names in order to keep things as private as possible.  I am so incredibly over what happened at that church a year and half ago, it's unbelievable, thus the reason it has not been blogged about for eight months.  Believe me, if it was still forefront in my mind, there would have been much more said about it.



I have thought long and hard about the issues that have transpired this last week and the decision I have made is that if anyone chooses to flame me again here, I may or may not respond to it, but either way, I will ban the IP address from being able to leave comments again.  I've already done that for the last commenter. It's not what I want to do, however, I also don't want to have eight month to a year old battles on my blog.  I have much bigger fish to fry.  I have a family to care for, and a church to help grow, and my health to be dealing with.  I have a relationship with God that deepens every single day.  I have knitting to do for heaven's sake and cat hair to clean up!  I simply have not the time nor the desire to deal with this any longer.  I have moved on and it's time everyone else does too...on both sides.  As I told the visitor I had the other day who was from the "other side", disagreeing does not have to make us enemies.  It was so nice to hear this person agree with that statement and we discussed how everyone, on both sides, needed to get over it.  



I hope you all stick around and read if that is what you want to do, but if you are just waiting for me to go off on a tangent about the split, I have not had that need in eight months, until someone rehashed it here.  So, if that is what you are waiting for, you'd may as well move on now.  If that isn't what you're waiting for, then welcome and I hope you occasionally find something here to make you laugh or smile.



God's blessings to all. 



I wish you all the best.  I truly do. 

Random Wednesday

So how about we hit a few updates, shall we?

The Knitting

The knitting is still happening but the current project is top secret.  With MDSW last weekend, and sitting down for an hour or so in the evening to knit, I have been reminded once again how much I love this hobby.  I am a mediocre knitter at best, but I can knit a mistake free scarf, hat or prayer shawl and even occasionally churn out a felted purse.  But I just love the yarn, the smell of it, the feeling of it in my hands as they work the needles with the stitches.  It's a pleasure that I never could have imagined having.  The feeling of creating something with my hands...it's nearly an unrivaled feeling.

The weight loss

This is still going well, though I have given up the scale for the time being as I was a becoming obssessed with getting on it not only every day, but several times every day.  But I am at Curves three days a week and the  two off days, I have been walking.  I feel incredible and clothing is getting looser by the week.  The eating healthy foods and only eating bad foods occasionally has become a habit now and I rarely have to think about what I'm doing.  It's nice to have that control.

The Cats

The cat pictures and stories are coming, I promise.  I have not forgotten.  I'm just having issues getting decent pictures of my two black baby boys.  I gotta tell ya, I love all six of my fur kids, and though the two boys are a little nuts and a wee bit goofy, they hold a special place in my heart.  Their little personalities are so simple.  They just make me happy.

Visited by an old friend

I had a visitor at the church today that I can not begin to tell you how nice it was to see this person.  Sometimes when I feel like I'm seeing so much negativity, so much of it turns around just by having a warm and simple conversation with someone I have always liked.  We discussed agreeing to disagree on certain things, but that doing so should not make us enemies.  It was nice to be on the same page.

Keeping it Real

My friend, Maryam, has voted me one of her "real people" bloggers and her friend made her real bloggers the little award you now see on the sidebar.  I try to keep it real here and to call them as I see them, so thank you, for the vote!  Very much appreciated!

You're only getting two posts in one day as I've been tagged to list my top five favorite locations to eat, locally.  We only go out to dinner about once a week and for the most part, I despise chain restaurants, so I'm hoping I have five as this place is loaded with chains!

1. RC Chings:  Last year, I discovered I love sushi and if you want sushi, this is the place to get it.  They do a steady business but it's not generally packed.  Great service and fabulous sushi.

2. Next Dimensions: Great atmosphere and incredible crab cakes.  Their honey mustard salad dressing is also out of this world.

3. Always Rons:  Another crab cake worth having.

4. Though it's a chain, Buffalo Wild Wings is a great place to take the kids for a simple meal where I can see the boys with wing sauce from one end of their faces to the other.

5.  Now I'm stuck.... well, actually, though I don't go there often (maybe once or twice a year if that), The Plum downtown is wonderful for lunch.  They are only open for a couple of hours each day, but they have great sandwiches and a cozy atmosphere.

So, there is my top five this evening.

It's What You Make of it

Did you ever have a discovery day?  One of those days when things you have heard your entire life suddenly makes sense.  I had one of those days today.

Today started out with a curve ball I was not expecting and though it would have been so such simpler to respond to vindictiveness with more of the same, I elected not to do that in the long run.  The fact of the matter is that I cannot change people; I can only change how I react to them. 

I had a whole 'nother post here only moments ago, but God changed my mind.  Frustration was running deep and I elected to go for the mile walk around the park to try to burn some of it off.  So, I grabbed my ipod and headed out the door.  That was all it took.

Once I stepped outside, God was everywhere; in the clear blue sky and the breeze that flitted through the trees.  He was in the sparkle on the lake and in the little ducks who were either swimming across the lake or nesting near the bushes.  He was in the trees that are finally growing full and green.  My heart was suddenly so much lighter and my spirit happier.  Tunes wafted through my ipod such as "My Savior, My God", "Oceans", "Great is Thy Faithfulness", "Morning Star", and even "So You Had a Bad Day."  It was interesting that God found it fit to throw that song into the shuffle mix. 

God is working on my heart all the time; teaching me patience and enlightening me to such things as the fact that I can't change anyone.  He can, but I am powerless to do it.  I can't help how anyone reacts to anything, only how I react to them.  But I'm not taking the bait.  With God at my side, I can rise above anything and for that I am eternally thankful.

As I came down the hill nearer to home, I found my thoughts praising Him for a remarkably beautiful day, for a body that is on its way to health, for a heart that is able to forgive, and that is open enough to hear that still small voice. 

It's all good.

Maryland Sheep and Wool 2007

Wow!  I can't believe it is over already!  I start looking forward to it around March and then the day finally arrives, and after so much anticipation, here I am blogging about it after it is over!

The day started early here; 6:00 am.  Robyn met me out front at 7:30 and we piled into The Beast (The Brit's Chevy Suburban) and headed to get gas and then out to the Park and Ride to pick up Lisa, Deanna, Kelly and Barb (Kelly's mom).  Though driving The Beast makes me a little nervous, it handles well and I love the fact that all seven of us can ride together!  Then it was off to the Howard County Fairgrounds for the festival!

The fairgrounds are incredibly busy for this event and people were just piling through the entrance.  The two things I love about this festival, other than the wonderful girls I get to attend it with, are the animals and the bargains.  We headed first to the booth where I got the wonderful price on Alpaca wool last year and sure enough, 2.95 a skein again this year!  I only bought one bag this year, though that has nothing to do with the fact that I have never knitted up last years Alpaca yet!  As always, this vendor has the longest line of the day, but well worth it!


From left to right, Barb, Kelly and Lisa, waiting in line to pay for their bargains.

The animals are always such a joy and this year we even got to see lambs!


       Five week old lambs


Even littler lambs, though no one was available to ask how old they were.

After paying for the yarn, Lisa had a great spot for me!  I love angels, and though I don't much collect them anymore for lack of room, I had to have this little gal:


She's knitting purple yarn!  Is that me or what?

And do any of you remember last year when I spoke of the woman who so closely resembled her Llamas??  Well, the photo is not the greatest as I decided against asking her to pose with her pets, so I had to pretend to take a picture of Lisa.  So, the llamas:



And the owner:


You really can't tell how long her neck is in this
picture due to the sweater, but trust me on this one...

We stopped for lunch and Shelley was so in the mood for her lamb gyro:



         She is so going to hate me for this picture.

And Deanna was positively beaming all day, because guess what??  She got engaged!  Sorry for not thinking of taking a picture of her beautiful ring!


                                     Beaming Deanna

We made a point to wander into the building that contained the awards for the show so far and we experienced some incredible work in knitting and photography.  But this little guy was sadly missed when the awards were being handed out:


                                    Best hair-do in show

So by the end of the day, besides a shirt, a mug and a pair of circular needles, I had purchased this:


From left to right: wool/mohair/silk blend (I love the color!) alpaca
and alpaca. Imagine that.

What I wish I could have brought home...well, to my other home that I don't own yet, but would like to one day, which is really more like a farm...in my alternate reality, was this:


                      The adorableness of Alpacas

And this:


               The fluffy silkiness of an Angora Rabbit

So all in all, a great day, with great company and mucho knitting finds!

Approximately 364 days until MDSW 2008!

And now back to your regular programming

So now that I think all the drama is over for the moment, let's get back to business. 

Well, wait a moment on that as I have one more thought to stick out there that doesn't really pertain to the churches, but it was brought on by the craziness that occured here a couple of days ago.

Why is it that so often people care what other people think? 

I read a lot of blogs and have made friends out in the blogosphere, and unless the blogger is talking about something really nasty, like promoting animal or child abuse or some other horrible criminal act, I don't care what they think.  I actually enjoy reading other people's opinions on life.  While it is nice to find things in common with other people, if we didn't have any differences at all, not only would that be dull as rocks, but we wouldn't learn anything new either. 

I've reached a point in my life, where other than my closest friends, I don't care what other people think.  I am who I am.  I don't put on pretend aires for anyone and I have way more important things to do other than to obsess over the fact that someone I don't know all that well maybe doesn't like me.  I'm too busy nurturing my relationships with God, my family and my friends to bend over backwards for someone who is unhappy with me for some reason.  Now if I have truly done something wrong to someone, I'll be the first to apologize, but my opinions are not wrong.  That's why they're called "opinions".  Obviously, someone else may not see things the same way I do and I have no issue with that.  We can agree to disagree and be done with it.  No one can change my experiences, nor would I want them to try.

Anyway, yesterday, I had the pleasure of taking part in a bus trip to "Sight and Sound" to see "In the Beginning".  This was the third production I have seen there and by far my favorite.    It was beautifully done and very touching and God was present in that theater.  Aside from the story itself, Sight and Sound uses many live animals in their shows.  We even had a skunk this time as well as horses, camels. alpacas, llamas, goats, sheep, dogs, birds, ducks, etc.  Much fun and very blessed day!

I really would like to head up there on day with no show on my agenda.  Amish country is beautiful and there are so many little shops I'd love to visit.  The sight of horse drawn carriages never gets old to me and I often think about all the stuff and gadgets we have and wonder what it would be like to get rid of many of them to lead a more simple life.  Hopefully, sometime soon, the Brit and I will make this journey to do some exploring.

Sheep and Wool the day after tomorrow!  Whoot!

An interesting comment

I had realized recently that this blog was getting a lot more hits from the Hagerstown area and now it appears that somehow this blog address has gotten out to members of the other church; the church that formed during our split a year and a half ago.  Fact is, my blog address is at the bottom of my emails and at times I forget to remove it before sending off an email to possibly someone who was once "on the other side." 



So, tonight I have received a comment in response to the To Heal or not to Heal post from September of 2006.  The comment reads as follows:



What happened happened. No forgiveness needed on your side; its the other side that has forgiven you for your rude, untrue comments. Its not true that we did picked up our "toys" and left just because we were defeated. We did not want to stay in a church where the Word of God wasn't considered infallible by all. To stay would be the same as agreeing with what happened. Its a shame what happened with your pastor and i do hope that things straighten out. But lets not act like children and put things on here for your "enemies" to read. Very immature and sick. Maybe you need to keep your unchristian like comments to yourself.

First of all, let's be realistic.  The word of God in our church was considered infallible by all.  The other side's complaint lied with the ELCA.  The word of God, the Gospel, has always been and continues to be taught and preached at our church.  In that building, that was never an issue.  I think you know that.  The pastors that we have had in that church since then, ELCA pastors, have continued to preach the Gospel, straight from the source, the Bible.  Again, that has not changed. 



There is no body of Christ, nor any affiliation or denomination, which is perfect.  All are run by human beings and where the word of God is not infallible, people are.  We are not God.  I am not bold enough to even begin to imagine what God thinks about some issues that are in our world today.  I am not Him nor do I have the capacity to think as He does.  I know He is a forgiving God and that by His grace, I am forgiven, as are you. 



Next issue, I have no enemies, nor did I ask you nor anyone else to read here.  However, if you have been reading here, you will see in more than one post, that I have stated that this is my journal and therefore, my opinions.  You have them too.   We all do.  I have also stated numerous times that I am not censoring this journal to accomodate anyone.  It's like a television channel; you don't like  what you see, then turn it off.  I'm not going to defend my opinions by listing all of the "Rude and childish" things that the other side said and did before the split nor am I above knowing that things were done by both sides that could be considered "unchristian-like".  Again, we are all human beings and it is our nature to say and do things that are not always right. 



My "unchristian" like comments, as  you view them,  are not being placed anywhere but on MY journal, therefore, I don't feel the need to "keep them to myself." That would defeat the purpose of a journal now, wouldn't it?  These are my comments, my views, my opinions.  If you don't like them, don't read here.



And finally, thank you for your well wishes about our pastor.  I hope he finds the peace in God that he needs to heal and that God is able to heal he and his family, if they just place their trust in Him.  It is sad what happened. 



I hold no ill will towards those that left and do not think of any of them as my enemies.  The reason the split hurt so badly and so deeply for those of us who are still there is because many of those that left were or are our friends.  There is hurt on both sides and I know that, but any time I have run into anyone who left the church, I have spoken to them, though there have been times that someone who left saw me and avoided my gaze altogether, and then no, I did not pursue a conversation. 



A friend of mine said, a year and a half ago, when I told her of this situation, "Honestly, it is so sad that Christians are best known for shooting their own wounded".  



So sad and so true.