Home Again

So I plan to blog all about my latest journey but right now, I am behind on life and Christmas in particular, so I have not yet even gone through the photos.  So stay tuned for that.

We just got home last night and The Brit is already en route to the airport for work, and will be gone until Thursday.  This will hopefully give me some time to get my life caught up a bit as well as get to some serious work at the gym.  I have gained a few pounds over the last few weeks between work stress and vacation and it has got to go.

On the flight to California, I was listening to my ipod and was reminded of something I had wanted to blog about during all the church drama.  When I was at my absolute lowest about the situation (and I am so much better now.  Stronger, leaving the drama queens behind me) I heard a song that has been out for quite some time that I had never taken any notice of before.  It may have played on my radio before, but I promise you, I had never actually heard the lyrics before.  What I do know was that God gave me this song on that particular day.  I get goosebumps now when I hear it on my ipod.

Lord move, or move me

I can't find the words to pray
I'm a little down today
Can you help me?
Can you hold me?
I feel like a million miles away
And I don't know what to say
Can you hear me anyway?
What I need is for you to reach out your hand
You have taught me
No matter what you'd understand

CHORUS:

Lord move in a way, that I've never seen before
Cause there's a mountain in the way and a lock on the door
I'm drifting away, waves are crashing on the shore
So Lord move (move), or move me.  (and He moved me, pretty much physically)

I've look every where to find
A simple peace of mind
I can't find nothing on my own
So I got to leave myself behind
Take up this cross of mine
Give away everything I hold onto (and in so many ways, I did.  I had to let go of things and people that felt impossible to ever release)

Lord I know the only way is through this
Lord I know I need you to help me do this

CHORUS

Lord move in a way, that I've never seen before
Cause there's a mountain in the way and a lock on the door
I'm drifting away, waves are crashing on the shore
So Lord move (move), or move me.

Out of this place of complacency  (*this is so true of the way I had been feeling at the church before it all went bad)To a place of fellowship with thee
Cause I am weak but Lord you are so strong
And you know it's been way too long (been way too long)

Lord move in the way, that I've never seen before
Cause there's a mountain in the way and I'll knock on the door
I'm drifting away, waves are crashing on the shore
So Lord move (move)...

CHORUS

Isn't it just amazing?

Start Spreading the News Part 2

Here is your second post by guest blogger, Jimnotmike.  Leave him comments; he lives for them!

ETA: For some reason this did not post last week, so I am posting it now.

Welcome back! I'm kind of enjoying writing these Travelog Blog Posts. It's so nice to not have an "Issue" to deal with or something to bitch about. Anyway...it is now Sunday in New York City.


Michael Buble--
We aren't sure how it happened, but somehow Siobhan and I both managed to miss the fact that Michael Buble, one of our favorite singers was performing at Madison Square Garden while we were in town. Thankfully we caught this error in time to get tickets. It was the 100th performance of his Crazy Love tour and it was amazing. If you haven't seen Michael live, I highly recommend it. At the end of the concert he put down his microphone, took off his ear piece, they closed the curtain on the band he sang acapella. Unaided, his voice filled MSG and it was perhaps the most amazing thing I have ever seen a live performer attempt. The man truly has a set of pipes!

Pretty great seats for a sold out event!

Showtune Monday at Splash--
This evening I met one of Kevin's New York Friends, Dan for drinks at Splash. Splash is a very popular gay bar in Chelsea. On Monday's the place is filled with every gay theatre queen in the city to sing along to every broadway showtune you can possibly imagine exists. It's great fun, and we try to do it every year when I'm in town. The drinks are also 2 for 1, and that never hurts. What sucks is that had I been in town for just a few more days I could have seen Kristen Chenowith perform here on Saturday night...that would have been over-the-top amazing!

Didn't have a pic from Splash, so here is Times
Square at night from my hotel room

That was the New York Trip, I may not enjoy the city, but I have to admit there are some fun things to do there. It's good to be home now for the Holiday's. Time to decorate and eat, and lets not forget the cocktails!!!!

Start Spreading the News Part 1 by Jimnotmike

Ok, New York! I just spent 10 days there. I was there for work, so I don't have too much to report, but I will take you through the highlights. Prepare to live vicariously though me. LOL

For the past 4 years my work has taken me to New York City over the Thanksgiving Holiday. As much as I don't enjoy NYC, it's kind of nice to not have to worry about the typical family-type trappings that so often seem to go along with this, or any Holiday for that matter. I don't have to fight over whose family to spend it with, how to squeeze in both families, or even what to cook.

So, here was my Thanksgiving Weekend...

Turkey Day--

I typically don't leave the comfort of my hotel room on Thursday. The hotel sits right on Times Square, so it is a madhouse of families with small children trying to view the Macy's Parade. I had a fine view of it from my hotel room window, and an even better view of it on television.

There goes Buzz Lightyear down Broadway!

I did eventually rip myself from the room around 2pm to walk over to Jamba Juice and get my Thanksgiving Smoothie (A Berry-Lime Sublime with an Energy and Fiber Boost) YUMMMMM in a cup! It's even better once you add a few shots of rum to it. At 6pm, I met my coworker, Siobhan for dinner. We always try to pick somewhere out of the way. The past couple of years, that meant the rotating lounge at the top of our hotel. They do a very stylish Thanksgiving buffet and because it rotates, you basically just sit still and sip your cocktail till the food you want comes around. This year we decided to do Japanese...the only restaurants that don't have huge waits for seating on this Holiday. There was a great place right down the street, and while I'm no fan of sushi, there was plenty on the menu to please me. After sharing 5 bottles of Sake, it really didn't matter what I was eating anyway. After dinner Siobhan continued to bar-hop, the woman is a drinking machine! I went back to the hotel. Sure enough about 10pm I start getting text message from Siobhan, insisting I join her at Don't Tell Mamma's. This is a great little bar, also right down the street. What makes it special is that people sing live there. Most of them are actual talented people who have or will be performing on broadway at some time or another. Of course, sometimes it's also some drunk schmoe off the street. Tonight was a pretty good night, but we didn't stay out too late because we both had to work the next morning.


The Carnegie Club--
Saturday night, both Siobhan and I took naps after work so we could stay up late. We met friends of hers at the Carnegie Club, which is right across the street from Carnegie Hall. It's an old Cigar Bar that has been in this location forever. Luckily I hadn't quit smoking at that point so I could take full advantage of it. In a time when it seems like you can't smoke anywhere, it was really nice to sit down on a comfy sofa, cocktail in one hand and a cigarette in the other. I almost felt like I was sitting in my living room. We were there for their Sinatra Saturday event which is a tribute to late, great singer complete with a 12 piece big band orchestra. The singer was great, and while he claimed it was a tribute show, not an impersonation of Sinatra, I sure thought he sounded just like him.

Yes, my sanctuary is larger than The Carnegie Club


Ok, this is going longer than I intended. Tune in later for Part 2

The Cig-Free/God-Free/Bitch-Free Post

Hello Everyone,

With Kim running off to California you are once again stuck with me...and I with you :-)

I have a lot talk about lately so maybe this will be broken into two posts, or 3 if anyone can stand it. 

First of all, lets talk about cigarettes, a product of which, I am no longer a purveyor. Yes, you heard it here first. JimNotMike is Cigarette/Smoke Free and I have been for a few days (perhaps a week, till this gets posted). My hubby Kevin is also now Cig/Smoke Free and by the time you read this for him it will probably be 2 weeks.

Just so we're clear. This had nothing to do with health(cause as long as I look good, it doesn't matter to me), or wellness(we all gotta die sometime) or stinky clothes(that is what cologne and laundry are for). This had to do with money, pure and simple. I sat down a few months ago and figured out that between the 2 of us, Kevin and I were spending $300 a month to stick flaming cancer sticks, coffin nails, fags (if you're in Britain) into our mouths one after the other. $300 a month! Hell, that's a car payment or a nice addition to the vacation fund. Heck, that'll buy a ton of booze! Yeah, don't expect the liquid libations to be going away anytime soon.

Kevin did it cold turkey(while I wasn't around, bless his ever-lovin heart). I, on the other hand, being the heavier smoker and the far more maniacal of the 2 of us decided I needed some help. I had tried the patch, and the pill, and the other pill, and the pill after that, and the gum, and even the hypnosis in the past. I knew that none of that worked for me. So I did a little research, on the web, of course. Google, I LOVE YOU!

Turns out, the nicotine in cigarettes isn't really whats bad for you(in unconcentrated doses less than 60mg, anyway). It's the 599 other things (Wiki Link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_additives_in_cigarettes) that they add to cigarettes that will kill you. Not to mention the fact that you're basically willfully submitting yourself to smoke inhalation every time you light one up. So, years ago when I was getting pissed off that I wasn't being allowed to smoke anywhere (airplanes, restaurants, bars, strip clubs, my office) I found a product called Njoy(http://www.njoy.com/). It's an electronic cigarette that basically provides you with a little bit of nicotine and the feeling like you're smoking, but you aren't really smoking per say. They say very clearly on their website that it is not marketed as a smoking cessation device, but I think its a great idea, even if the FDA doesn't. Njoy offers a way for you to stop smoking (the bad part) with out killing those around you (the good part) and right now, let me just say that my Body Count stands at zero. The greatest part is that once you're over the idea that a burning torch isn't stuck between your index and middle finger, Njoy has cartridges that have no nicotine in them. So you can switch to those and still feel like you are smoking while your body gets off of the nicotine habit. It's a win/win for everyone. Not to mention the fact that you can "light them up" in restaurants, train cars, airplanes, offices, strip clubs, etc.

In the meantime, the cartridges cost less than cigarettes and since the only byproduct is water vapor, my house, my car and I don't smell like we spent the night inside a burning building.

So, as it stands right now. I have quit smoking without quitting my addiction to nicotine, and I am ok with that. I'll work on the nicotine part later. Oh, and for anyone who is interested...it looks like the 7-Eleven chain of stores is carrying the Njoy product everywhere. I'm not getting paid to endorse that...but I sure wish I was!

This is it for awhile maybe

Okay, so today, I have to drop by both the kid's schools with emergency contact information for while we are away, call the alarm company and then get ready to head up the road two hours for the show.  I said good-bye to my kids this morning as I will be gone by the time they get home and The Brit will have to see them off to grandma's house. 

The pastor came in today to wish me a nice trip and during the conversation I mentioned that my mother was keeping the kids while we were away.  He said and I kid you not "I have to call her.  I don't know where she's been."  Really?  That clueless?  The church attempted to stone her daughter and he wonders where she has been.  Wanna place bets that the call to her never happens?

So tomorrow I am off for the west coast and I am insanely excited.  I am looking forward to exploring a new city I have never been to before, the weather will be a bit warmer than here (sixties all week) and it is time away from what has become a stressful part of my life; the church.  I'm looking forward to seeing Margaret, Doug and JJ (my sis in law, brother and nephew) and hopefully Ed (my great nephew).  I am again having dinner with my girls from elementary school on the 11th, which will be our last night there.

I just love to travel and wish I had the time and money to do it more often.  I just look at each trip as an adventure and I have always had an adventurous spirit anyway.  I love experiencing new things and have always thought that was part of what life was about anyway.  Experiences help us to grow in so many ways and I never want to be one of those people who are content with things to just always be the way they were.  Though I have never embraced flying, or rather, the possibility of crashing,  it is a way to get from point A to point B and sometimes the only way to get there.  If the alternative is not seeing new places, I will fly, like it or not.

Well, I am babbling now and impatient to get the day underway.  I do have at least one guest post from Jimnotmike to go up and I may try to blog on occasion next week.  Thank you all for following me here to this little private spot, which will one day go public again.  Hope you all get your shopping done next week (I haven't started yet which is kind of scary) and you stay warm if you are in one of the colder regions. 
Have a great week!

Oh and just for shits and grins, Jimnotmike, I am really looking forward to the tourist trap of Fisherman's Wharf and have no desire to see an old prison. ;)

Four More Quiet Hours

I say quiet because the world was in today to learn to make bows and no one spoke to me.  I actually welcome the Church Lady on Thursdays as she is oblivious to the whole ordeal and speaks.  Not that I really care except right now, The Brit is out of town so the kids have been my main source of conversation.  Whoo Hoo.

I like the haircut which puts me in a bit of a pickle as I am riddled with guilt.  I like my normal hair girl.  I like this new hair girl.  But I have been with Kristi for years.  I kind of feel like my ex-church, turning on her for no good reason.  Not sure I can continue with it.  I may have to go back and just tell her I got it cut in California.

I was PMSing as I started this morning and I am so freaking tired right now but my farm in Farmville is not ready to harvest till eleven.  My body is aching from my workout yesterday and I want it to be bedtime.

So tonight, I went into the kitchen to fix a cup of diet hot cocoa while the kids were messing with the electric train under the Christmas tree.  I heated up the milk in the microwave, mixed up the packet of chocolate in it and then got inspired.  Walking into the room where the kids were, I muttered aloud "If I had butterscotch schnapps that would be awesome."  The kids busted up laughing and The Genius said "Nice mom."  Turns out, they thought I said, "If you would get shocked, that would be awesome."

Not as Behind as I thought.

It has been a fly by the seat of my pants kinda week.  I had a schedule and despite the fact that I have not stuck to it, I am not that far behind.  When The Brit is away, I don't sleep as well; it takes me longer to fall asleep and I awaken far earlier than is normal for me.  Also judging by the circles under my eyes, I am PMSing, so I am sleep deprived and lacking in energy at the moment.  Yet I remain more or less on schedule even if I have indvertantly rearranged it.

I worked out with Sonia today and this one is brutal.  The last one now feels like cake, but I guess that is the point, huh?  Got home and finished decorating, then took The Genius and went to church as I am going to miss the next two Sundays.  Oddly enough, I had just gotten to the Y today and was warming up on the treadmill and saw this guy waving to me as he was leaving.  I was confused for a moment before I realized it was my new pastor.

Tomorrow, I cheat on my hair girl and then I am supposed to go run with Bebecca, who is a beginner runner....and it is freakin' cold outside!  I also need to call our alarm company to see if they can walk me through an adjustment again because the heat is setting off the system and we got a notice from the police again that we have used up our two "get out of jail free" cards and the next time the police are sent out, it will cost us $30.  We adjusted the kitchen one last year in the winter as the heat can set it off but it is happening again. 

Friday I am riding up to Kirk's college to see his roomie's senior project which is a series of plays he has written.  I am going with the music director and her hubby and I am wondering if the question of "are you ever coming back to church?" is going to come up.  I would imagine it will be hard to explain but I have been thinking about it.

When we left, I did not yet have in my mind the mentality of "I am never coming back."  But I also didn't expect to walk into a church I am growing to really enjoy.  I think in different stages of our lives, we feel different ways about God.  As teens or young adults, often we keep God at arm's length.  We want to know He is there but we want to do our own thing and not think about it too much.  As we get a little older, we need to be involved and we want to set the right example for our kids where God is concerned.  So we are there out of a sense of obligation.  Then we get a little older and we realize that at times life is hard and we need to rely on Someone more than just ourselves and we want to know as much about that Someone as we can.  I was there.  I was craving more knowledge; I wanted to be able to understand and know the words that could help me handle some of the things life was throwing at me.  I wanted to discuss these things with other people who were craving the same things.  I wanted to be led by someone who had been Called to serve.  The problem was that the pastor where I was, though Called, was not, in my opinion, leading anyone.

When the split happened five years ago, I was still in that obligation place.  Then we got Pastor Phil and he made me sit up and listen.  I started actively pursuing my faith.  A void I had not even realized I'd had started to be filled.  A year later, he was gone and we had the next one, who was so overly dramatic and a bit of a jerk in person.  He was nasty to me on a regular basis and by the time Sunday rolled around, I could barely look at him yet alone try to get anything out of his sermons and I NEVER would have even considered talking to him one on one.  Four months later, the problem was discovered; he was having an affair and had been caught and he was gone.  Our next interim, though a horrible sermon giver, was amazing one on one, so again, I started to get some of what my soul craved.   Most of the congregation didn't like her due to her lack of decent sermons but the employees loved her due to that one on one time during the week.  When she left, we got the current one and you know how that story goes.  With this one, I started to lose faith that there were "real" pastors out there other than retired ones. 

So when this all went down at church and I left "temporarily" God had something else in mind.  He had been nudging me for awhile and I been ignoring but He knew what I needed and led me to it but putting a few people in front of me to guide the way. 

But will this make sense to those I left behind?