The Clampetts Get Their Nails Done

I will not do this story justice and trust me, you just probably had to be there to experience the full magnitude of the fabulousness.� I am judging, yes,�I admit it, but some things are just like a train wreck, where you just cannot look away.



Today was my coveted pedicure day. Nothing feels better to a girl who has spent the week working out and fall cleaning, then to have her feet babied for 45 minutes and then to walk out with pretty toes. It is just a wonderful thing.� I got there about 12:20, having mentally prepared myself to have to wait as they would probably be busy as it was Friday, but much to my surprise, the place was empty.� The little korean (are they korean?) man smiled at me and asked what I needed and then told me to pick a color.�Then the little Korean lady I call Erin (not to her face, but she reminds me of a person I know named Erin.� I'm sure this woman's real name is something like�Ae Sook or Chung Ae�or something like that, but I refer to her mentally as Erin.� So, Erin set to work on my toes.



Well, a matter of minutes later, three women and one child walk into the shop.� The child of maybe 8, has a mohawk dyed green which first caught my attention.� The leader of the pack, a woman of size, announced she was flipping the bill for her sister's manicure, her friend's pedicure and her own "mani-pedi."� These women were loud and giggley and in�a matter of minutes, I found out that that the leader had apparently just come into a huge settlement for something (she brought in a Western Union bag with her if that means anything) and that they are from West Virginia, and no offense to any West Virginians, as I know several who are wonderful, bright, intelligent people, but these women were not so much; I am thinking mountain women.�



The Leader had, and I kid you not, the skankiest feet I had ever seen in my life and she was going to paint them and her nail neon green...the same color has her house and the new ball she bought at the Walmart yesterday.� No lie, not making this up.� We are talking built up calluses all over the bottoms of her feet, black toenails and unshaven legs. I have never seen any of those Korean girls wear a trashbag on her hands to shave off skin until today. These woman kept up a constant conversation the whole time.� The friend, an older woman had her eyebrow pierced and seemed to be the most normal of the bunch.� She informed The Leader that she would be her friend whether The Leader gave her any money or not (I am thinking this chick came into some big bucks...maybe she got a leg wax before she left).� Erin kept exchanging amused and thankful looks with me.� I think she was thankful I came in first and it was not she carving the pile of skin off Leader's feet.� Leader's husband game in, a small, round man,who had not yet visited a clothing store with his wife's recent inheritance and told me he had never had one of them there pedicures before".� I told him lots of men had not but it was probably a relaxing thing to do.�



The Leader told me that she and her sister had 7 siblings to which the sister replied "Seven?"� The Leader starts naming names.



"Matthew.."



Sister: Who is Matthew?



Leader: Larry's boy.� Our mama married him so he's our brother...and Christina..."



Sister: Who is Christina? (can you tell just how close knit a family they are?)



Leader: She was still born but she's still our sister!



I cannot make this stuff up.� I had to wait to get out into my car to break into laughter.� Not sure why this clan picked a nail salon in my town but it did make for an interesting pedicure!



Have a great weekend, gang!� 10:15 Sunday if any of you can come!