Life, On-Line

Last night, after all the men in the family had headed upstairs to bed, I ventured to the board that I shared with Jane and about 7 other women.  I went back through the archives, reading old posts that I had posted and reading the responses from these wonderful women, including Jane.  I wasn't surprised to find myself reduced to tears of mourning for this dear friend that I have never met face to face.

The really hard part of grieving for an on-line friend is that if you don't have on-line friends, chances are, you don't "get it".  How can people who have never shared lunch, share a friendship?  Years ago, people had Pen Pals and though I never had one, I have to liken my on-line to that.  Anyone who had a pen pal, I'm almost certain came to care about that person so why would an on-line friend be any different?

As an adult, I love and cherish my girlfriends, some of which I have never met face to face.  Nina, Juli, Jane, Ruth, Jo, Jaime, Ellen, Jeanette and Jan, I have known for nearly ten years.  I have laughed and cried with them, rejoiced and mourned with them.  A few years ago, we lost another member off this same board and it was every bit as painful as the loss of Jane.  A few years ago, another member lost her son in a car accident and my heart ached for her as a mother and a friend.  Some have battled cancer and we support each other and cheer each other on when the good news happens. 

Andie, who I have spoken of before, has been my friend for 6 or 7 years now.  We have exchanged Christmas and birthday gifts and shared in each other's trials and struggles through written words in a chat window.  I have probably spent more time talking to her in chat on any given night than I talk to any one of my face to face girlfriends in one day.  How can I not come to love and care about her as if we lived next door to each other?

My blogging friends, I have not known as long, but they have been an endless source of information and support for me through my surgery and weight loss.  No one I know face to face  (other than Celia and we converse via email alot) could have provided me with such knowledge.

Deyse and Gaby, I have spent most Saturday and Sunday evenings chatting with for the last few years.  Their lives are different from mine as one lives in Mexico and one in Brazil but we have an amazing rapport as we share our lives.

My friend network is very diverse; some I go places with and some I just spend hours talking to.  Does that make one group more important than the other?  Not for me.  I love them all.  That's why Jane's passing is so hard for me and for all the other women of that board who loved her.   We are a small, intimate board of women, just there to support each other in life and in faith.  I know them well and would not be the same person I am today had I not known them.

Many of you have probably seen this little poem, but I love it as it says exactly what it is I feel.

Dear Lord,

Every evening as
I'm lying here in bed,
This tiny little prayer
keeps running through my head.

God, bless my mom and dad
And bless my little pup
And look out for my sister
When things aren't looking up.

And God, there's one more thing
I wish that you could do
Hope you don't mind my asking
But please bless my computer too.

Now, I know that's not normal
To bless a motherboard
But just listen for a second
While I explain to you, my Lord.

You see, that little metal box
Holds more than odds and ends.
Inside those small compartments
Are a hundred of my 'friends'.

I know for sure they like me
By the kindness that they give
And this little scrap of metal
Is how I travel to where they live.

By faith is how I know them
much the same as you
I share in what life brings them
From that our friendship grew.

Please take an extra minute
From your duties up above
To bless this scrap of metal
That's filled with so much love!