Ah, the wayward blogger returns. Seems there is so much I want to do and not enough hours in the day to accomplish much of any of it. But I really need to start prioritizing a few things or I am going to be totally screwed in the long run and will have no one to blame but myself.
I keep talking about doing things but cannot seem to fit them into my schedule to actually accomplish much of anything but the fact is that if I do not start making myself a priority I am going to put on more weight and the pounds I have gained since last March already need to go. My head keeps wanting to go back to running as I am thinking it will help keep things under control along with controlling my carb addiction, but my knees and the clock have been disagreeing with me. But I need to give it another go. I was never much good at it really but on some sadistic level I apparently enjoyed it as my head keeps returning to the thought.
I have gone back to kickboxing and have been trying to hit the gym but it is hard. Yet I know that cannot be an excuse. I have some tight clothing and I refuse to start buying larger sizes. Hell to the no. I grocery shopped healthy today. I even waffled over some protein powder but let's be realistic...I hated that shit. But I need to go back to eating like a healthy person. I used to do it easily and am not sure when it got complicated. I think I got comfortable and complacent and figured my problems days were over and that I could eat like other people and just not think about/care about what I was putting in my mouth.
The fact is that it will never work that way for me. I am not one of those people. They exist; the ones who can eat anything and never gain an ounce but it will never be me. I need to accept that and move on. Working on it.
I have still struggled with sleep issues and have just switched over to the Ambien Extended Release. Last night was the first night on it and it went well. Here's hoping.