Wow, was last night emotional or what?
This week was the week of Choices and the first choice presented to the contestants was a 2lb advantage for a team at the weight in or not having their trainers for a week. If no one jumped at this, the stakes would go up...a 4lb advantage, etc..
So Tracey, the chick who wound up in the hospital the first day and who is dear, sweet Mo's partner, decides two pounds is totally worth it and without consulting Mo, she takes it. Seriously? FOR TWO FREAKING POUNDS? Of course, Jillian and Bob are livid when the truth comes out, explaining to Tracey Of The Crazy that she needs to trust the weight loss process and Bob and Jill to train them effectively. Uh yeah. I concur.
So then we have a temptation, which always involves food. The contestants are in little segregated areas and are faced with a miniature 100 calorie cupcake. (One contestant states he wants to take the cupcake and rub it all over his body...priceless!). The rules are as follows...whoever eats the most cupcakes (they can chose not to eat any, which is what the smarter contestant should do IMHO) gets control of the game on weigh in day. Meaning, that person can chose out of each team of two, which weight will count for the week. Guess who eats four cupcakes? Right, Tracey Of The Crazy.
So people are worried as the loose canon of the week has their fate in her hands and poor Mo has no trainer thanks to Crazy Girl. Some of the contestants speak to Tracey Of The Crazy before the weight in, asking her what her plans are for their team, to which she responds with "What are you thinking?" Amanda, one of the smaller ones on campus asks to let her partner's weight be the one that counts, because Amanda has not been dropping big numbers. Daniel asks for his weight to be the one that counts, because Shay, being the biggest girl ever on the show at close to 500lbs, needs to stay on the ranch.
So the weigh in happens and Tracey of the Crazy pretty much does the opposite of what was asked of her. Amanda's partner, Rebecca is chosen to have her weight not count, but thankfully Amanda pulls a 5 pound loss that keeps them out of trouble this week. Antoine and Sean fall below with Daniel and Shay, because of course, Tracey of the Crazy picks Shay's weight to count. b*tch.
So as is TBL custom, the contestants in danger of elimination sit down to plead their cases before the votes are cast. Shay is devastated. Her druggie mom is dead and she has no support anywhere. She only wants to be happy and inside she is as far from that as she can get. Shay is crying, other contestants are crying, I'm crying. Antoine looks at Sean and says "Can you do this at home?" and Sean says "Yeah, can you?"
And just like that, two guys are every bit as selfless as Tracey of the Crazy was selfish this week. The guys went home and have lost a bunch of weight already by the time last night's show aired and Shay and Daniel live to see another week. Tracey of the Crazy now probably has a target on her back and judging by the previews for next week a little bit of karma is heading her way.
It's the good stuff, like Antoine and Sean that make me love this show. I love the weight loss, the adaption of healthy lifestyles, but it's the stories that keep me coming back for more.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
So I thought about writing about family drama, but I'm going to see how it all plays out. It does not involve me other than I am a member of the family, thankfully (thankful that it doesn't involve me...thankful for being a member of the family depends on what day it is and what is going on LOL!). Hopefully it will all resolve.
Shiloh is doing well well. She came through her mastectomy fine and will start chemo in three weeks. The pathology report came back and only two of eleven lymphnodes positive for metastatic cancer!!!! Keep the prayers coming gang as they are working! Her outlook and attitude are incredible!
Huge blog THANK YOU to Shelley for sponsoring me for the 5K breast cancer walk! Thank you, friend! Shell lost a friend to breast cancer a few years back, so she knows firsthand what this disease can do. Her donation will go with others to help support women getting mammograms and help for women battling breast cancer! If you can help join in the fight by sponsoring me, please go to the CBA and search for my name (Kimberly Jones) to donate. I am currently at $125.00 in donations and that beats my minimum goal of $75. My high end goal is $200 and any more than that would just be a blessing! Well, all donations are a blessing but an extra one!
I ran sprints again yesterday after a weekend of really bad eating and have dropped another two pounds. I feel as if I have found a bit of magic for however long it lasts! I am not to the point yet where I enjoy running minute sprints..the last thirty seconds, I am sure that death is right around the corner, but I'm getting through them and the results will keep me going.
I don't post these kinds of things here to brag or to say "See what I'm doing." I do it to keep myself accountable as well as in the hopes it may help someone else. Exercise is rarely fun but the results are and I like sharing what I have learned, such as switching up your workout routine can do really cool stuff to your body! It still amazes me, as a girl coming from 315+ pounds at one time that I can exercise! It still amazes me that I was a soda-holic and now don't even crave them. Sometimes if someone has a root beer, I'll have a sip, but that's it and that's all I need and that is an extremely rare thing! I once scoffed at the people who would tell me that once I started drinking water I'd crave it. Yeah, right! But now I can see that it was oh so true. I do crave it and drink more of it than I ever have before in my life. The norm for me is 64 ounces a day of water alone and then we always get water in our foods as well.
I think it also really important to stress that yeah, we are in a terrible economic time; we all know it. Stress can take a terrible toll on us, so the importance of exercise and taking care of ourselves becomes even more important. The best thing you can do for anyone you love is to take care of you. Your loved ones want you around for years to come and when we put everyone else first, we inevitably place ourselves last. In some situations, that is fine, but not so with health. You won't be around to take care of your loved ones if you don't care for yourself.
Be kind to yourself.
You deserve it and you are worth it.
Friday, September 25, 2009
There are people in my life who do not understand these friendships I make via the internet. I have made friends from chat rooms and message boards and many from the blogosphere. I have met people who helped me through my father's cancer diagnosis and eventual death, because they had already been there with their own father. I have met women who were molested as children and we were able to help each other. I've met people who share similar interests. And I have met incredible women who took the WLS path before me.
Yesterday, Susan donated to my walking the 5K for breast cancer. Today, Jil donated as well. These are people I have never met face to face; have never spoken to on the telephone. Just plain good people who are willing to invest in a cause that in some way affects or will affect us all. So Jil, thank you, and I will be praying for your friend who is battling breast cancer. We are in this to kick cancer's ass!
So, I ran sprints again today...one minute sprints and three minutes recovery. It nearly killed me but you know what? For the first time in forever, my scale dropped three pounds this morning so I was totally motivated! It's hard for me to run, but if it is the kick my body needs to get back to losing, then so be it.
Again, if you can help in the fight against breast cancer, go here and sponsor me in the 5k (Kimberly Jones), as I walk with Shiloh, her family and friends.
Have a happy and safe weekend!
Thursday, September 24, 2009
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So I'm trying something new from over at Donna's site...well, new to me, not new to the blogosphere. So on Thursdays, I'm going to attempt to blog a list about thirteen things of my choice. So, I'm starting simple with 13 things I still want to do before I die. Goals are a good thing.
- Ride a horse on the beach
- Write a novel for publication
- Travel to Ireland, Brazil and Hawaii
- lose these last freaking 50 pounds
- run a marathon
- Do live theater again
- Visit my hometown
- Own a big dog
- Discover as my kids grow up that I have been a halfway decent parent
- Go on a cruise
- see my church grow
- Spend a straight week in London, just exploring
And as far as I know, Shiloh came through surgery fine. When I last heard she was in recovery, so keep those prayers coming.
Yesterday was not a good day in my world. Lots of irritation, lots of kids acting up, a little church drama, a lot of unnecessary rushing around due to changes in kid's plans and cryptic messages from kids being left on my cell phone. Then a storm starts and kills the satellite right at 9:00 when "Glee" is coming on....not. a. good. day. And so far this morning, I have had a spat with my husband and have left my cell phone at home. Apparently, I need wine and lots of it tomorrow night.
I have always had some serious stress vices. Food for example. I got stressed, I ate. And ate. And ate. I ate my way to 315 pounds (and actually I was once higher than that. I found my old Curves stats papers last week. Yikes!). The only thing back then that helped me to not to eat as much was smoking. Cigarettes, my dear old deadly friends. But even to this day, when life gets really stressful, I want one...or ten. I'm just choosing not to go buy a pack, which in all honesty, just adds more stress as I fight that inner battle whenever life gets tough.
For me, there is a difference between relaxing and stress coping techniques. I love internet surfing, reading and watching my favorite television shows, but these things are not stress busters for me. They don't give me the same satisfaction when my nerves are on edge as food or smoking. So what I have done is learned to use exercise as not only something to manage my weight, but to manage my stress.
Taken off Hubpages, the following just proves the point:
The Psychological Benefits of Exercise
- Physical activity is increasingly becoming part of the prescription for the treatment of depression and anxiety. Exercise alone is not a cure, but it does have a positive impact.
- Research has found that regular physical activity appears as effective as psychotherapy for treating mild to moderate depression. Therapists also report that patients who exercise regularly simply feel better and are less likely to overeat or abuse alcohol and drugs.
- Exercise can reduce anxiety - many studies have come to this conclusion. People who exercise report feeling less stressed or nervous. Even five minutes of aerobic exercise (exercise which requires oxygen, such as a step class, swimming, walking) can stimulate anti-anxiety effects.
- Physical exercise helps to counteract the withdrawal, inactivity and feelings of hopelessness that characterize depression. Studies show that both aerobic and anaerobic exercise (exercise which does not require oxygen, such as weightlifting) have anti-depressive effects.
- Moods such as tension, fatigue, anger and vigor are all positively affected by exercise.
- Exercising can improve the way you perceive your physical condition, athletic abilities and body image. Enhanced self-esteem is another benefit.
- Last, but not least, exercise brings you into contact with other people in a non-clinical, positive environment. For the length of your walk or workout or aqua-fit class, you engage with people who share your interest in that activity.
Endorphins are chemicals produced in the brain, which bind to neuro-receptors to give relief from pain. Discovered in 1975, endorphins are believed to: relieve pain; enhance the immune system; reduce stress; and delay the aging process. Exercise stimulates the release of endorphins, sending these chemicals throughout the body. Endorphin release varies from person to person; some people will feel an endorphin rush, or second wind, after jogging for 10 minutes. Others will jog for half an hour before their second wind kicks in. You don't have to exercise vigorously to stimulate endorphin release: meditation, acupuncture, massage therapy, even eating spicy food or breathing deeply - these all cause your body to produce endorphins naturally.
Kind of amazing when you think about it. So I don't just exercise for weight benefits or because I like to be busy running to the gym. Technically, my exercising is probably keeping people alive and me from completely alienating everyone in my world, because I am angry and on the verge of a major eruption of volcanic proportion some days. It's not always a cure-all for a bad day, but it definitely helps.
I have actually discovered that when I am skipping exercise, not only do I lack energy, but it shows in my mood as well. I am more irritable on a regular basis or just feel "out of sorts". I think that once one starts exercising regularly, the brain starts to depend on those endorphins being released and when it suddenly stops for some reason (like vacation) the brain reacts or goes into withdrawal or something. I just think that all in all, exercise is a good thing for everyone to do, and it is definitely a MUST for me. My life is stressful, as is everyone's. I spend a lot of time running kids to appointments, shopping, running errands for people, keeping a house clean in the face of three men, laundry, which is a full time job on its own and daily coming up with things to cook when I despise all things culinary. I would like to think that it is known fact, that the women of the households are who keep it running smoothly. If we stopped doing what we do, well, let's not even go there. It is also an under appreciated job. No one says "thanks for my clean clothes, mom!" or anything like that. In other jobs, you have a paycheck to show you did your job; not so with motherhood. Clean clothes, clean house, food in the fridge and on the table, simply becomes the "norm". People really only notice it when it ceases to exist.
Okay, did not mean to go off that tangent, but you see what I mean about stress. It exists for all of us so if you are feeling particularly fragile or explosive, go climb on an elliptical, or walk a mile, or cycle. Chances are, you will feel much better for having done so. Besides, it is a good way for mothers to thank themselves for a job well done.
In other news, my friend Shiloh is probably in surgery right now for a mastectomy, so please keep her in your prayers today and in the days to come. The good news is that there was no call when her x ray and blood work results came back to indicate the cancer had spread. I'll let you know how she did when I text her hubby later.
And speaking of Shiloh, thank you to Susan for sponsoring my walk and helping us to kick cancer's ass! Susan and I have never met in person and she found my blog when she was looking into having RNY. She has since had the surgery and is doing great. Thanks a million, Susan, for your pledge! It means a lot.
If you can help, go here and sponsor me in the 5k (Kimberly Jones), as I walk with Shiloh, her family and friends. Chances are if we can find a cure to any one kind of cancer, the rest will follow!
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
I loved last night's show.
For those of you who don't watch, Week Two on the ranch is notorious for being a bad week. When you take people who don't eat right and don't exercise and start them on intense exercise and a healthy diet, they have amazing losses the first week. And they did. But such extreme weight loss puts a strain on the body and freaks it out a bit. It isn't sure what is going on, and it reacts by going into a starvation mode, convinced that it is facing a famine, and wants to hang on to everything it has.
Thus Week Two. People who have eaten right and worked out like a crazy person have GAINED on the show in week two. So what happens? In typical BL fashion, they are presented with a challenge. If the 15 contestants lose a combined total of 150 pounds in week two, no one goes home. If they don't...two* people go home. I nearly swallowed my face and when the contestants told Bob and Jillian found out, they were pretty freaked out too. After all, there has never been a good week two yet alone attempting to have one of this proportion.
But these 15 people took on the challenge with commitment and isn't that what losing weight is all about? BL also gave them some headway. Two challenges, both won, gave them I believe it was a 35 pound advantage at the weigh in.
Shay broke my heart a little bit last night when she told Bob she wanted to be happy and that she never has been. Her mom was a drug addict who died at a young age and Shay is the heaviest woman in BL history. Bob not only made her say through tears that she DESERVED to be happy, but assured her, he was going to make sure she achieved that goal.
So the weigh in! After the first team of two failed to pull the numbers they needed (and in their defense, I think they are the smallest two girls. The less you weigh, the smaller your numbers seem to be each week) things took off and not only did they lose the 115 pounds, they lost without the advantage, the 150 pounds between them!
I cried me some happy tears.
My scale on the other hand, is not moving and is pissing me off. I need to do something else, but am not sure of what to do. I am thankful I am not gaining, of course, but moving to a lower number would be nice. What do I change up? What worked for you guys, my WLS friends. I have pretty much been on a plateau since a few weeks into summer and I am getting frustrated given that I workout five days a week.
And a huge THANK YOU to Robyn for her donation for my walk with the CVA CV! Love ya, girl and yes, we are one day going to kick the butt of this disease and cancer in general!
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
So, my friend, Shiloh, who has just been diagnosed with breast cancer, has asked me to walk a 5k with her, her family and some other friends on October 24th, for the BCA CV. I am signed up and ready to go. But I need some sponsors! You can donate as little as a few bucks if you can. My low end goal is $75. My high end goal is $200. If you can help, go here and click on "Donate to a Participant". Then type in either my name (Kimberly Jones) or go under our team name of "Gooses Girls" and find my name that way. Anything you can do will help the cause. On their main page, you can read about what the funds go to...early detection programs as well as post-op programs. 100% of the funds raised go into these all so important programs.
So, I am asking you to help my friend, through me, but sponsoring. Plus, I get to walk my first 5K for a great cause, which is pretty cool.
Today has been busy; cat to the vet for possible bladder irritation, work, groceries and soon kickboxing. I'm already feeling drained because I was awake at 4:00 because of noisy garbage men and worrying about the cat. My cats are my other kids, so when something is wrong with either, I lay awake and worry. Plus it was a little warm last night and I had issues getting comfortable. But the cat is more or less fine...hopefully a change in diet will do the trick. I'm going to be optimistic.
And tonight is "The Biggest Loser" so I'll give you my thoughts on that tomorrow. And wasn't the season premiere of "House" fabulous? I loved it!
Friday, September 18, 2009
I am trying diligently to blog a bit more regularly though I really don't think I want to be a slave to it any longer. I have now experienced the freedom of not feeling as if I have to blog and I like having the choice (I guess I always had the choice, I was just a little OCD about it).
So last week, I posted about my issues here, and my delightful sister in law, Shannon asked me this:
Kim, I agree with your statements on the two main subjects, and that is confusing me, because I've always considered myself a conservative. Maybe it's because I also believe in the "judge not, lest ye be judged" passage.
Now how about another subject, such as gun control? For or against it? I am against gun control because government can't guarantee me that they will get all the guns away from the criminals. Until that happens, I want to keep mine for protection against them. Is that a conservative viewpoint or liberal?
Well, this compelled me to do a little looking. Remember, I am pretty non-political and after finding this, I am even less political than I thought. Even on the issues I spoke about in the above mentioned post, my views are a bit different from the liberal views cited on this site. I do believe that human life begins at conception, which is a conservative view, but I also believe that a choice should not be taken away for the reasons I mentioned in my post. I don't know how I feel about the death penalty either. What I do know is that prisons are too easy for hardened criminals. If you are in jail, especially for a serious crime (I mean, they are all serious, but I'm talking rape, murder, kidnapping, child abuse etc) I don't think you should be allowed to get a college degree, or television rights etc. We have people living honest lives who don't have the money for those things, plus I assume my tax dollars are paying for it.
This site also states that liberals are not concerned with the environment and that is so not me. I have a great love of wildlife and oceans and mountains and rain forests, so I must fall into the conservative category there. And according to this site, the folks who feel you can own a gun no matter what are conservatives. Really? I am so non-political I am confusing myself.
I don't know how I feel about the gun thing, Shannon. I think they are far too accessible for people to get a hold of. I think it is too easy for crazy people to bear arms and for kids to get hold of them as well. However, there are too many people in this country who have guns that I don't think the normal person's defense should be taken away. Ugh, all very confusing.
When it comes to religion, I am conservative in many ways. I don't think God's name should be taken out of the Pledge of Allegiance or off our money. Our country was founded on Christian values, but I also know that other religions exist. The problem I have is that it seems like everyone wants to defend the rights of the other religions by taking away the rights of the Christians. Just my thoughts.
So what does this make me? I have no clue. I only know how I feel about certain issues. Maybe I need to not be so concerned with labels.
Let's move on to something that gives me less of a headache.
Susan intrigued me with this:
Hi Kim, I have also hit a kind of plateau however I continue with my walking. Got to say I really enjoy it. I'm going to walk in the Balto. 1/2 marathon which will be approx. 13 miles. I feel very confident I can do this I just hope all the runners doing the 1/2 don't run me down.
Susan, when and where is the Baltimore half marathon? I would love to do something like this!
She also said this:
And here you're going to think I'm crazy but I'm going to join Weight Watchers. I am approx. 10 1/2 months out and feel like I really need more of a structured food plan. They have this thing called E-Tools online that lets you track everything you eat so I think that will help me. Do you think it's silly that a RNY patient is joining WW ??
And nope, I don't think it is crazy. In fact, I have heard of many RNYers going to Weight Watchers to help them continue to lose. I also think though that Livestrong.com has a food tracker too, so you may want to check that out!
Happy weekend, peeps! Not sure if you will hear from me again before Monday or not. Depends on if I have anything to say!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
So this week I started a Muscle Makeover class at the YMCA. It's been interesting; kind of a beginner class for hand weights, which I needed as I have trouble knowing what exercise is for which muscle, so I am learning things. After Monday's workout I was pretty sore, but after last night's workout, I'm not really feeling any of that having worked my muscles ache, so I guess I need to graduate from five pound weights up to eight pounds, at least for the arm work. The chest work (lying down on a step aerobic step with arms out to the side holding the weights and then lifting) is still killing me so I think five pounds for that yet. We'll see how it goes.
Still kickboxing (Have to have my GBC for the week) and Spinning on Thursdays. Also walked twice this week (the days I have the MM class, so I get in some cardio). Not losing much yet in pounds which is frustrating, but I have confidence that things will start moving better once again. I have lost a little, but nothing to get excited about yet. I am still battling bread, especially this week. I can go without it forever, but then the craving hits and nothing calms it. I gave into cravings twice this week for Subways sweet onion chicken sub things (half of course) and though it is not terrible, it isn't overly wonderful either.
What do my other WLS gals eat for lunch? I often try to have leftovers from a night's dinner, but we don't always have leftovers or it will be something I am just not in the mood to have. Breakfast is a no-brainer as I've been eating a scrambled egg with cheese and half of a multigrain muffin with sugar free jam. Dinner is dinner. Lunch is my problem. Give me your menus please as I need help!
I think in the next few weeks I am going to try to hit the yoga class. I've always wanted to give it a try and as I have been trying all the things I have always wanted to, it's time to do one more!
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
I love this show. I know it has its share of people who don't like it, but I am not one of them. Of course, I look past the snippets that are aired as for every two hours a week we see, there are 166 hours a week we don't see and of course, they air what they consider to be the best stuff for their ratings.
But reality television put aside, this show changes lives. People who battle weight often don't know where to start in order to get their health back on track and this show helps them do this. They have two amazing trainers, doctors and other folks to make sure these people are doing the things they should do and can do and they have all this at their fingertips.
The season premiere was tonight and it was amazing. Of course, three stories really stand out above the others. Daniel, who started his journey last season, weighing in as the heaviest contestant, is back to finish what he started. He got voted out, in my opinion, because his friend who was on the show with him, blew it for him. I rooted for him last season and am overjoyed he is back.
Shay is the heaviest woman to ever be on the show, weighing in at close to 500 pounds. Daniel picked her to be his partner in a heart touching moment and the duo did a great job this week losing 29 pounds between them.
Then there is dear Abby, who brought me to tears. In 2006, her husband and two young children (one being a two week old infant) were killed by a driver going over 100 MPH. She also did a great job with weight loss the first week and stood up there and talked about how death would be an easier choice for her...that it was being here on earth that was hard and how there was no one else to share this journey with, that it was just for her. She reduced Jillian to tears and between the two of them, I joined them in the cry fest.
Alexandra and Julio fell below the yellow line the first week and Alexandra was voted off to go home, but has already lost 60 pounds from the time she was sent home (the show is obviously not live) and she plans to be at goal by the finale.
This show just inspires me to work a bit harder; to reach my goals. They are all within my reach, I know this. It is simply the choices I make every day that determine how long it takes me to get there. We can all do it. We just have to decide to. It's as easy and as difficult as that. If someone had told me 16 months ago that i would be exercising five days a week, sometimes more than once per day, I'd have laughed my ass off. Yet, here I am and most days I even enjoy it.
Monday, September 14, 2009
So I had a really good weekend with the exception of Saturday morning when I received an email that someone I know and who is younger than me, has just been diagnosed with an aggressive breast cancer. The news nearly took my breath away.
I met this person in a job that was better defined as Hell. The profession itself should not have been one of an atmosphere that fostered contention among employees but it was. The two people who ran the place (and I use the word "ran" loosely) made sure that stress ran high. They did not really allow the environment to foster friendships; they were much better at turning people against each other. I did walk away from there (after they lied and fired me for job abandonment, which I so should have fought because I so would have won) with a few friendships with the girls I worked with directly, but not with anyone who worked in the back. Departments were often pitted against each other by the ones in charge, sadly.
But a few years passed and I got a message from this girl on Facebook, asking me for help with an exercise program because I had been "inspiring" her. I was honest with her and told her about my surgery. I told her I would happy to help her with what worked for me, but that I was no expert. She was in the process of moving back to my town and we had been discussing when we were going to get together.
Then I got her email. This is a gal who has two young children and is in her thirties. She is scheduled for a mastectomy this month and this week they are testing her to see if the cancer has spread to any other organs. I'm praying constantly it has not.
She has been on my mind constantly and it is such a reminder to take care of every single day we have. That the things we complain about are often not that big of a deal. It has also reminded me of all the times we stop talking to God when our lives are going well. We feel as if we don't need Him when things are going our way and life is good. I do it all the time. Then suddenly things get bad and we are wondering where God is only to discover that he has been standing behind us the whole time we had our backs to him.
I know God is with my friend right now. I'm hoping she'll let me be there for her too.
Every day we have is a precious gift, to be lived to the fullest. Don't take any of them for granted. Take that chance, reach for that brass ring, do the things you are most afraid to do. There are no second chances to our lives here, so make each day count. Leave that legacy, point to the heavens for every miracle you witness...and we witness hundreds of them every single day.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
I got some great responses from my little political blog post so I thought I'd go the extra mile and give you where I stand on a few hot issues and why. Please know that I am not a political person by nature; discussing it is just not my thing and my remarks today have more to do with why I am a liberal as opposed to a conservative. Please also know that I am always open to hear other thoughts and opinions as long as they are expressed with respect and I promise to give you the same. I may not agree with you, I may not understand why you feel the way you do anymore than you can understand why I feel the way I do, but I would never tell you that you are wrong. I feel that our experiences are our experiences and they are what shape of our views of the world and the issues of the world. My experiences are going to be different from yours; that is simply a given.
Probably one of the hottest debates is the one that has been debated for years; the abortion issue. In all honesty, though I am pro-choice, I am not always comfortable with that label. I HATE when abortion is used as a means of birth control for careless people who do not want children but who want to have unprotected sex. I think aborting these babies is wrong on every possible level. Please understand this.
However. I was just doing a little Googling and here is just one statement that I found:
But the number of people raped probably is much higher than what is reported to authorities. In 2005, only 38 percent of rapes and sexual assaults were reported to law enforcement officials nationally, according to the 2005 National Crime Victimization Survey. In 2005 at Truman, two rapes were reported to campus officials or DPS.
There could be any number of reasons why a woman would not report a rape. Maybe she has been threatened. Maybe the shame is too great. Maybe she in some way feels responsible. Whatever her reasons, the fact remains that she was raped and if a woman gets pregnant on account of a rape, I don't feel she should be forced to carry that child. Now, people have said to me "but there will be exceptions for that." I would for someone to explain to me how. Are we going to tie these women up in a court of law to decide if they were raped and/or if they are permitted to abort the baby? This would also open the door for any woman who wants to use abortion as a means for birth control to say "Well, I was raped."
In the event of rape, is the baby at fault? Of course not. But neither is the mother. I would like to think that if I were raped and got pregnant as a result of that rape that I would be strong enough to be able to carry the baby to term and then make the choice to give it up for adoption or keep it, but I cannot say that with any certainty. I'd have to be in the position to know how I would react emotionally. I admire any woman who was assaulted who is able to carry that baby to term, but I also know that not everyone is strong enough to do that; to have that reminder of a brutal attack where a choice was already taken from them. No woman should have to face that for nine months; to be reminded in a physical way.
So it is because of those women that I have to label myself as pro-choice. I could never take a second choice from them and I can not figure out a fool proof way to protect them.
Then there is the whole homosexual issue and this one exhausts me. Having done much community theater in the past, I have met and friended many gay men. I have friendships with some of these men that go back to when we were 18 years old and when you go back that far and were that young, you are generally in the thick of some self discovery and acceptance. I have sat with many of these young men at the time, when they had just "come out" to their parents. I have sat with them while they told me, with tears in their eyes, how their parents said to them "I don't know why you would have chosen this." And I sat there and listened as they looked at me in pure anguish and said "Kim, I never would have chosen this! This isn't what I want to be."
So after many years of thinking about this, I realized that I had never "chosen" to be heterosexual. I never woke up one morning and thought "Hmmm...men or women?" So if I never chose, how can I think they did? Also, can anyone deny the children that are born with sex organs from both sexes? Or children who from the time they are very small are convinced that they are in the wrong body? That they were "supposed" to be the opposite sex. Now stay with me here for just a moment, okay?
No, I do not think homosexuality was originally what God had planned. The Old Testament makes that clear. I also don't think God intended cancer, birth defects, MS, polio, or any other number of things children can be born with. But we live in an imperfect world and we have probably advanced ourselves beyond what is safe. We use chemicals everyday, take medications for all different things, breathe in all sorts of fumes and toxins and pollutions. How can we not think that these things in many ways do not have an impact on our heath or the health of our unborn children? I think there comes a time where religion has to take common sense into consideration.
The other thing that deeply disturbs me are the radical conservatives who will say "that person is gay and is going to hell." Despite what the Old Testament says, Jesus came and made a new convenant with God's people. He died for the sins of the world...so even if you insist on believing that homosexuality is a "sin" Jesus died for all sins, not the sins of the world except homosexuals. There is just no way I can look at this and think that if you are gay, you are going to hell. That goes against not only what life has taught me, but also against everything I believe to be true about God.
So there is my two cents on the two biggest issues I have with radical conservatives. In many issues, I can see where the conservatives are coming from, but the radicals (like the chick on Facebook) just cannot see the rest of the picture. We can't always see things black and white when we live in a gray world. I'm just so thankful that God's wisdom is so much greater than me.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
So I got into a Facebook argument of all things. Like what is this? High School?
So there was a poll about whether or not Obama's speech to the students should be shown in school and I voted "yes" and stated that my reason had nothing to do with if you liked this president or not. It was about showing children that the office of president needs to be respected. In my opinion and experience, there are way too many kids out there who are not taught respect, period. So if the president wanted to go on television and tell the kids about getting an education, I had no issue with that. So this chick I went to high school with, who is apparently very much a conservative, commented on my answer to the poll stating she was against it and that she felt people needed to hear both sides. Of course, my thought was "Both sides of what?" So I kind of asked her that...what is the other side of telling kids to get an education? Drop out of school and work in fast food forever? I mean, c'mon. So she comes back saying it should be at the discretion of the parents (I can give her that...understandable) then she goes into not trusting the president and he is known by the company he keeps, etc. Again, I questioned her and questioned how she seems to be feeding into rather old news stories, so I asked her about the company the president apparently keeps. Then she goes into a whole religious thing, saying he goes to Muslim countries and says the US is not a Christian country (we do have muslims here, Jewish people etc, after all) and then insinuates that Michele Obama said she was finally proud of her country and construing that to make it sound like she was finally proud because of a Christianity issue. Hello? Seriously? So I corrected her that Michele was proud of this country, as was I, that we had finally elected a black president, because of how far we had come. And I quoted a news source from the BBC that talked about Obama's religious upbringing (all the while wondering how in the hell we had gotten into this argument over my initial comment about kids being taught to respect the office of president. Again, seriously?) which she then complained about saying we had our independence from England (huh?). I explained to her that I was trying to show her how easy it was to find another news source that could denounce what her news source said. She then told me my reasons were lame, that she was sure I also had something against Palin (uh, yeah) and pretty much just attacked my views.So then I got really ticked and told her she was narrow minded and for someone who originally said people needed to hear both sides, she was certainly unwilling to listen or respect any of mine.
Then I unfriended her.
I hate that kind of stuff. I know we all don't feel the same way about most things and I can disagree and be disagreed with respectively. But don't attack me. And don't turn my opinion on something else into a political debate about our current president.
In other news, my mother needs to understand that there are things I don't need to know. I don't need to know that because we have a boat, there are people who think we are loaded with money. Yeah. Why do I need to know this? I know other people who are as "loaded" as we are, who also have boats (and like us make payments on them). And then of course, we built a deck. C'mon! Seriously? We manage our money. We have debt. We have the maximum withheld from our paychecks as it works as a savings account. I am a cheapskate and proud of it. I buy my clothes from second hand shops to save money and because I like saving money and recycling clothing. I will not pay top dollar for anything. I am a deal hunter.
People are making me crazy. I think I will envision a few of them at kickboxing tonight....
Friday, September 4, 2009
Today was nice and laid back. Went into work for an hour to finish up some stuff and then took the rest of the day off. Went to lunch with The Brit and then a little window shopping, then onto Aaron's therapy appointment. Tonight is Fire Pit night! Next week I have lunch scheduled with Kelly after not seeing her all freaking summer. It's all good.
I'm looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow a bit and hopefully doing some studying in my two women's muscle building books. Not looking to bulk up like the Hulk or anything but I would like to make my loose skin look as decent as possible. I have the cardio down but now I need to be doing some serious toning to go along with it. I'm actually pretty psyched about it. There is lots of stability ball stuff in the books and when The Biggest Loser starts I always tend to do floor exercises while watching because no one else in the house watches so I am down here all alone.
So lots on my agenda...a hopefully nice weekend and then back to work on Tuesday!
Thursday, September 3, 2009
So after my ride yesterday, I was zonked. See, when I get out on the canal, my curiosity gets ahead of me. I am always wanting to go farther, to see what is up around the next corner. Then there is the deer issue. They are everywhere out there and when I see them, I have to stop and watch them. So by the time I was finally on my way back and checked the time, it was 2:48 and I had to pick up JJ at 3:30 for a doctor's appointment...and I still had like four miles to go. And it was on the way back so my energy was not as good as it had been when I started out, but I had no choice but to put in the hardest gear in order to eat up ground to get back in time. It pretty much kicked my butt.
Then last night my blood sugar did its plummeting trick so by 9:30 I was falling asleep on the couch and went up to bed.
Today i had it out with my youngest son who has been boundary pushing and has decided that yelling at his mom is an okay thing to do, especially after she had taken her time to clean his room, so I got my crazy on with him and told him off and he wasn't too sure what to think of that, but he sure has been sweet tonight!
I went to Spin class tonight and was the ONLY student. Kind of weird but still got in a good workout.
Tomorrow night is fire pit....thank God and I have a four day weekend!
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
I completely enjoyed my afternoon today. Got off work and went to run a private, not to be blogged about errand. From there, I decided it had been several months since I have checked Goodwill for clothing. Anyone who knows me well, knows that this is my biggest contribution to going Green. I love used clothes. I love that they are already broken in and comfy. Now some of you might say "But ewwww, broken in by whom?" And I am here to tell you that is what washing machines are for.
I got some great name brand stuff. Two pairs of workout pants ($3 each), a pair of padded biking shorts (these were a STEAL at $3. They sell new for thirty-something bucks!), a beautiful St. John's Bay sweater ($4), a hoodie ($5), a Christopher Banks sleeveless hoodie ($6) and Cabin Creek long sleeved soft and snuggly material shirt ($4) and an adorable pair of shorts ($4). I was thrilled to bits. I had sent in some broken never to be repaired jewelry to Red Swan and got a small check back from them, and I was trying to decide on what treat to spend it. This was by far my best option as I so got more bang for the buck!
Then once I got home, I elected to bike to the drugstore to pick up a prescription, which was awesome. I actually will get in a second workout today with kickboxing and I got two in yesterday as well as I did my gym thing and then
Tod called me and asked if I wanted to walk. It was such a beautiful evening, I went out with to enjoy it as well as his company. My plan for tomorrow is to load up my bike on the car before work and then after work head to the canal for a ride.
Remember that my trainer friend at the Y once told me I needed to look at exercising as being an athlete in training? Well, I finally feel as if I am back on target!
Life is good....and beautiful.