I chose the wrong profession

So, yesterday, I get this call from Johns Hopkins informing me that my upcoming appointment with the nutritionalist is not a covered benefit by my insurance, so I would need to call their finance office to make payment arrangements for the appointment.  I call them, and they re-explain that to me, so I ask the obvious question:

How much will the appointment cost?

She asks if this is the initial consult and I reply that it is the only appointment as far as I know and that only one appointment is required by the bariatric program there at Hopkins.  Then, I was glad I was sitting down.

"Okay, the first nutritionalist appointment is $535.00."

"What?"

"$535.00"

"Per person?"

"Yes"

"It's only ninety minutes."

"Yes, the first one is always more expensive."

"It's only ninety minutes."

"Yes, it is billed in 15 minute increments."

Isn't that like $89 every fifteen minutes or $5.93 a minute???  How much schooling to be a nutritionalist?  Sign me up!

So anyway, I called my surgeon's secretary and asked if we had to see their nut, because if so, I couldn't afford it.  She said we only had to see theirs if our insurance covered it but if not, we could see one locally.  Now, granted, Baltimore is a big city and I live in a small town about an hour and a half outside of the city, but the nut I called today will run about $125 for the session. But of course, the local nut needs to know what Hopkins wants her to address with us.  So, now I had to email someone else at Hopkins to ask that question before I can set up the appointments. 

I'm getting tired...I hope we are soon on our last hoop....