Wedding Thoughts

Today's guest blogger is Mike, who I met working for Corporate America back in the very late eighties.  We fell out of touch for many years and then reconnected on Facebook a few months ago.  When I asked for help with my blog for the mission trip, I am so grateful he was one of my first volunteers. 

So, give him some love and encouragement as he is now thinking of starting his own blog.  From Mike:

Wedding Thoughts

Before I start the discourse related to the official title I want to just say thanks.  Kim, you may have started something here. I have always enjoyed writing but always have found excuses to not write. I tend to keep it as that thing out there I want to do but do not do. Maybe it is that last item on the bucket list. I do know that the hardest thing about writing this blog was to settle on one topic, in other words I do have a lot to say. I just may have to start blogging. Now I shall go on with the wedding thoughts.

I have been pretty busy for a few weeks or I should day weekends. I have performed three weddings in a row this June. For those who do not know me, I am an ordained minister. I do not work as a paid minister, I did at one time but for many reasons I retired. I have maintained my license and ordination and have performed many weddings over the years. Why do weddings? It takes lots of precious time and it is not really a business for me, yet. It started as a favor for a friend and quickly the word got out that I could marry people. I realized that so many people do not have a minister to perform their wedding. Some do not go to church and cannot find a minister because of that and others have a church but have been living together. Their church wants them to marry but will not marry them because they live together. That �logic� makes no sense to me. I began to realize that I could fulfill a need for so many people.

I may have a different way of thinking than most ministers but I feel comfortable with my thinking and that is what is important to me. I love weddings, Jesus loved weddings; remember he chose a wedding feast to perform his first miracle. Weddings are truly a celebration of love. I enjoy the casual outside wedding much more than the stuffy and formal church wedding but I will do either. I have the best spot in the house. I get to look the bride and the groom in the eyes and feel the emotion. I wish every person would have that opportunity. It is my feel good moment. I am addicted to the love. Even if the marriage later fails, I know that there was love in that moment.

Weddings need to be a time for love; I believe people worry too much about the ceremony and the occasion. I think the smartest move I have ever seen was when a friend of mine eloped and later threw a party for all of their family and friends. That was probably 25 years ago, they are still married. It wasn�t the ceremony that kept them together, it is the love.

 I have traveled the United States from coast to coast and points between to perform weddings. Some of the places I have performed a ceremony include: a hunting camp in the mountains of Pennsylvania, a winery in Maryland, the San Francisco Zoo, the Bad Lands of South Dakota, the streets of Sturgis during bike week, the Gulf Coast of Florida, various beaches on the East Coast, numerous homes and backyards in Maryland, Pennsylvania, and West Virginia, and yes, even in some churches. I have been dressed in a tux for a ceremony and I have worn shorts and a t-shirt. All of that has been interesting and fun even but the item that makes any of them a wedding is the love. It is not the words I say, it is not the cost of the event, nor the location, it is the love between the bride and the groom.

 �Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, (love) is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, and it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. Love never fails.�  I Corinthians 13:4-8

 These words are included in most ceremonies, the love being spoken of here is not the love of romance, but is the love of a Christian what the Greeks called �agape�.  I believe that is the love that is missing when a marriage fails. Romantic love can sustain us for only so long; if we do not have a wedding/marriage that includes �agape� there will be more of a struggle. My advice and intent in writing this is if you are not married be sure that you have the type of love mentioned in 1Corinthians on top of your romantic feelings. For those of you who are married, do not forget the �agape� yes the romance is important but do not neglect the �other love� it never fails.