I have so much going around in my mind this week in trying to prepare for next week, that I am totally ADHDing about what to blog about.� I am sitting here trying to cool off while watching The Doctors stick needles in some woman's face and grossing out totally...and then the blog got interrupted by my sugar plummeting due to a couple of Twizzlers.� Yes, I bought some today because my thought was i would take them on the mission trip and then I wound up eating a couple.� They hit me harder than anything else does and I ate them like two hours ago!� But it might not have been just them...I had not eaten since about 11:30 and after a couple of Twizzlers I went for some fruit and I probably needed some protein.� So just had a whole wheat english muffin with some all natural peanut butter so hopefully all will be well by kickboxing time.
I still have things to pick up prior to our early morning departure on Sunday for a seven hour drive.� I am looking forward to the mission trip; not to the drive.� I have some snacks for the car picked up, and some of my own healthier staples ready such as my whole wheat sandwich rounds, oatmeal, crystal lite.�
Later the same day...
Okay, back from kickboxing and have just finished watching "Losing It with Jillian" and this has been a favorite ep for me; actually made me cry.� Overweight parents, kids who worried about them, a father who shuts down and doesn't communicate leaving the mother with no one to lean on.� Heartbreaking.�
I think as women we worry a lot about our families; we worry about health and relationships and men don't always communicate so well.� We often wish they would.� I worry a lot about The Brit. A lot.� Can't imagine life without him.� We aren't young anymore and though I don't feel "middle age" in numbers, I'm almost there.� I worry a lot about The Genius, who has trouble obeying rules at home and I wonder what will happen to him when he gets out in the real world if he continues along the same path.
I can't make anyone else want what is best for them or what I believe is best for them; they have to want it for themselves.� There is nothing I would not do to help them achieve their goals if they would set them. But I can't set them for them.� I so wish I could want it for them and that would be enough, but it isn't and it never will be.� I don't want unreasonable things for them or for myself.� I just want them to live long, healthy lives.
Anyway, the father on the show finally saw what he was doing, how he was shutting down emotionally due to feelings of failure due to weight and the loss of his job.� At the end of the show (total of nine weeks) he had shed 61 pounds, had found another job, resolved to be more open and available for his wife and was oozing confidence.
Brought a tear to my eye.� Mom was down 41 pounds and you could see the strength in their relationship.� Very moving.
I'm trying yoga tomorrow night.� I'm kinda nervous.