It's All A Big Mind Game

I am starting to think that running is way more mental than physical and that thought really blows me away.� For three weeks, I have not been able to go over two miles and I was beginning to get frustrated.� So today, I showed up at the gym, with a bandana around my head to catch sweat and my new over the ear earbuds in my ear and as I was getting ready to get started on the treadmill, Jerry came up to ask me how things were going.� I lamented to him about my failure to run over two miles and he asked for details; how fast I was running, how often, etc.� I told him how I would play with the speed to try to make the two miles hit sooner.� He suggested slowing it down a little today and keeping the speed consistent to try to break through the two mile barrier.� I agreed to give it a go.



Just over a mile into it, I wanted to quit; knew I would never be able to break the two miles.� Then only about two dozen times after that I wanted to stop.� But all of a sudden I was at two miles and something clicked between my body and my mind.� No, it didn't suddenly get easier and I did stop at 2.25 miles, but it felt like my breathing was suddenly easier and my knees weren't killing me and I PASSED THE TWO MILE MARK!� Wow.� I think it was a mental block; my mind telling my body what it could not do and I have to find ways to stop listening to it, because it lies.� I could run more than two miles and today proved it.� So thank you to Jerry who pushed me through it without even knowing it probably as he left not too long into my run with a "Let me know how it goes."



And can I tell you that I feel like The Beast with a bandana around my head at the gym!� Like Towanda or something.� I liked it and it kept the sweat out of my eyes.� And the new earbuds stayed in my ears for the whole run too.� Today was a good day.� Finished up with a kettlebell workout and crunches.



Tonight movie with kids and then kids to grandma's for a few days!

GoDaddy Went Again

So the new (or is it now the old?) format is back.� Sheesh...it is starting to make me dizzy!



Almost hump day already, thankfully!� YAY.� My posts will probably be crap for the majority of the week just because of time constraints, but tomorrow is a bit more low key, thankfully.� Work, gym, farmer's market.� Nothing in the evening that is pressing, unless we decide to do something.



So sporadic comments tonight...



Tonight is R&B night on Idol...I hate that kind of music.� No offense to anyone who loves it, but it has never appealed to me.



The Church Lady apparently could not believe I would take off the Monday of Holy week.� I just rolled my eyes and told her I had it all under control.� I know what I am capable of getting done in what kind of period of time and I don't get my panties in a wad when I'm busy.� I actually prefer it to boredom.



Jimnotmike, I am not upset with you about your comments that don't always agree with the way I see things.� I have a soft spot when people call the church and are in need for their kids.� I have turned down numerous people who want us to pay their rent or their light bill, because we simply cannot afford it.� But a birthday cake for a six year old?� My thoughts are that a six year old is not at fault for whatever her parent's circumstances are.� I would imagine if her parents are having that much trouble with a cake, she must not get a lot of perks...and to a child, a birthday is a big deal...and it should be.� Just my two cents.� I'm glad we could help.� I am all about giving people an opportunity to turn their lives around...I just wasn't in the position to do that.



Ugh...I barely know most of these songs and I don't like the ones I do know.� What is happening to Idol this season?� Where is Crystal?



Anyone know how I add Google Reader or a Follow Me with Google Reader thingy to my sidebar? I have no clue.�



See?� Completely meaningless, boring post.

Laying Low on Monday

So no work happened today at all; did not go to work and did not work out.� I know.� *GASP*� Instead, Tod and I went thrift shopping in PA, though I found very little.� A pair of pants and a teeshirt, and a pair of bib overalls for my youngest.� We also stopped at a produce market and I picked up some stuff there as well as a book at Wonder Book.� We had lunch in a little cafe that served the best cream of crab soup I have ever had and it is apparently their Claim to Fame as the waitress told us.� Really good.� Had a half of a yummy good sandwich too...again delish (I like that word despite the fact that it came from Please Shenk Me Rachel Ray.�



Then it was home and to the library where I checked out a few cookbooks and the book "Food Rules" that I had on hold.� I've discovered that maybe I don't hate cooking; what I think I hate is getting stuck in cooking ruts, too afraid to experiment too much, but here's the deal, dawg.� The Brit has been making amazing Sunday night dinners that he has never made before.� One was a Jamie Oliver recipe and I'm not sure where the other two came from, but damn, they were good.� Yesterday was a chicken in blackberry sauce that was to die for.� But his trying this new stuff is making me feel a little bit braver, which is why I checked out some cookbooks today; two Jamie Oliver�and the Cooking Light Best Recipes from 2009.� It still have to be healthy; no crap food or fried food.� Must be nutritious and there must be greenery present.� We'll see what I can dig up.



So tomorrow it is back to work with a newsletter to put out in four hours, and then to the grocery store.� Home for awhile before kickboxing and then right from there to the church for a music rehearsal.� Hell week has begun (not to be confused with Holy Week...it is still holy, just for me it is also insanely busy!), but I am kidless Thursday and Friday and Monday and Tuesday, as I am working.� So Friday after work, all the female youth group members are going for pedicures, then meeting up with the guys for lunch.� I am looking forward to that as being at the end of this insanely busy week.� The Praise band sings at the Thursday night service and I am involved in a Good Friday dramatic reading.�



Okay, off to pour over recipes!

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly of the Week

That seems like a good topic for Fridays, doesn't it?  By Friday I am heading for a coma, so I don't much feel like dreaming up a decent topic (Do I ever have decent topics?) so let's go with mindless, shall we?

The Ugly:

I ate some terrible crap this week.

The Bad:

Even though I knew it, I continued to do it...was just freakin' hungry all week.

The Good:

I got on the scale today and my weight is still the same.  Thank goodness for exercise!

The Ugly:

I still have a newsletter to do for the church and have decided to take a mental health day on Monday, which means I have to get it done on Tuesday.

The Bad:

Working at a church can make one strongly dislike Christmas and Easter because I have tons to do.

The Good:

One more week and no more major church holidays till Christmas and you know how I feel about that holiday, so there will be no further discussion of the C word.

The Ugly:

Thought I was going to die on the treadmill today after two runs and two kickboxing classes previously this week.

The Bad:

My knees are still aching like nobodies business.

The Good:

I did run six miles this week and Jack McFarland is still cute.

Happy weekend, peeps!  See you Monday!

Thursday Thirteen Randomness

So now Godaddy has reverted back to the old format....I kind of liked the new one.� Easy come, easy go, I guess.



Okay, I have no theme for today, so you get the jumbled up mess of crap that runs through my head on a daily basis.

 

1. Why have I been so freakin' hungry since yesterday?� All I want to do is nibble.� It's like I am hungry for something but have no idea what it is so I need to sample many things until I find it.


2. And that essentially means that right now, I am exercising and running to maintain my current weight which puts me no closer to that 199 I have my eye on.� Do you all ever get like this; this constant hunger and if so, how do you reign it in?


3. I just realized that since March 8th, I have been at the church every day, some days more than once and it will continue to be so until April 10th.� I may need to take a vacation day.


4. I am looking forward to a second kickboxing class tonight but my knees are not.


5. I love Dailymile and the people there.� I posted a "Hi, new here" message and now have a handful of friends.� Thanks to Emily for introducing me to the site.� For those of you interested, you don't have to be a runner...you�can be a walker or just an exerciser in general.


6. We just had a member of our congregation meet a young couple here who are struggling.� The man called yesterday to try to get help for a birthday cake for his six year old daughter's birthday on Sunday and I left a note for pastor to announce it in church last night.� A mother and son rose to the opportunity and just met the couple with a grocery store gift card.� I think that is awesome.


7. Tomorrow is thankfully Friday.


8. I have to go to youngest son's school tonight from 4-5 for something called "Spotlight On".� Have no idea what is being spotlighted.


9. Thank goodness Paige went home on Idol last night.� Though I didn't dislike her, her performance Tuesday night was painful to listen to...but then again, I felt the same way about Miley Cyrus' performance last night on Idol.� Ouch.


10. I found a pair of headphones on eBay that someone recommended for $5.49 with free shipping.� If I am experimenting with headphones, they need to�be cheap.


11. Is it 12:30 yet?


12. I really need to get my eating back on track again so I can move from maintaining my weight loss (which is not a bad thing) to actually losing again.� Do you think running makes you hungrier?


13. "Food Revolution" is on tomorrow night and I'm excited to see it.� I also loved Jil's comment about Rachel Rae.� "Rachael Rae makes me want to shank myself...her voice makes my ears bleed..."

If you want to play Thursday Thirteen, you can do so here!

Plateaus and Headphones

Godaddy has completely changed the look of the blogging page again and I am trying to figure it all out.� In trying to figure it all out, I realized that this post will be my 976 blog entry, so I am thinking there may have to be a give-away for�the 1000th post as way of a celebration.� I just have to figure out what to give away.



I have been on the same freaking plateau for almost a year which translates into my still being in the VERY low 200s which is pissing me off.� My�problem area is my abdomen and I know you�cannot target a specific area with exercise and I know that�this is not all loose skin, so what the hell people?� Something has got to help!� I just want that 199 on the scale and I will never wish for another pound off again!� EVER!� I�want to weigh under 200 pounds; all I want from life at the�moment.



I�am having�headphone issues with my running.� My mega-short hair (which I love) allows for lots of sweat while running to run all around my ears, which makes my ear buds freaking fall out and that is highly distracting while running on a treadmill because one of these days, I am going to�try to grab this thing as it slides out of�my ear and wind up flying off the back of the treadmill and splattering up against the back wall of the YMCA and there goes my running career right out the window�off the treadmill.� I have been asking opinions on�DailyMile and of course, everyone has one and no one swears by the same pair, which still leaves me trying to decide.� But the slippage has got to go and I'm not sure duck tape will do it.�I wind up yanking them off for the last quarter mile because I am tired of fighting it, but it makes the last part of the run endless because I am tired by then and I can hear my breathing which makes me feel bad for the poor buggers near me who aren't wearing headphones.� I prefer oblivion when I can't hear myself, so I can think of how even my breathing is the whole time as opposed to those moments of gasping for breath and even emitting the occasional groan.



Ya know what else is funny?� When I was starting out with the C25K program, I wrote on here that I would cover up the display on the treadmill as it helped me to not have to see how much further I had to go.� That was during like 10 minute running intervals.� Now that I am running two miles, I cannot bear to cover it up because I HAVE to know how much longer I have to run and sweat before I can stop.� Welcome to my contradictory world.

Kickboxing Tuesdays

This is by far my favorite workout of the week.� I love this class and he is teaching again on Thursday, so I have to work out dinner for the men so I can get myself there before Praise band rehearsal.� I hate to miss a Jack class and again, the fun of exercising with other people is awesome, so much so that I started asking names tonight.� There are a handful of women I talk to each week and tonight I was like "What is your name?� It is important that I know that."� So I now know Jo and Rod and Carin with a C and I know my MIA tonight buddy is Teresa.� It is just so much fun to interact and laugh while still sweating my ass off, but the interaction distracts me from thinking about how tired I might be or whatever.� So all good.



Jimnotmike, I have to say that I like Jamie and that if Rachel Rae or worse yet, Alton Brown were doing it, I'd have to shoot myself in the ear or not watch "Food Revolution".� I had never given Jamie Oliver much thought but watching him in the premiere was quite moving.� And watching the clip I posted yesterday was moving.� And he is doing something that no American chef has stepped up the plate to do.� Are there things in it for him?� Of course.� But I am still pleased as punch that someone is using the platform of their career to do something to hopefully further the health of America.� I know Jim is too; it is just a matter of preference-kind of like me with Jack McFarland and J, the Thursday night kickboxing instructor who makes me want to kick the crap out of her.� She has done nothing to me, but she just rubs me the wrong way.� But she is still doing good things for people; I just can't bear to be around her.



So tomorrow, I run.� Thursday, I am hoping to kickbox and then another run on Friday.� I have still not gone above two miles and don't feel ready to do so.� But yet, how will I know?� Will I just suddenly know at the end of two miles that I can do more?� Should I chose a day and try to push it to 2.5?� My long term goal is 3.5 miles; a 5k, and I don't really care if it takes another four months to get there.� But how will I know when it is time to advance again?�

Food Revolution and Meet Hilda

Sorry about the lack of post Friday, but Fire Pit Frenzy had it's yearly inauguration that night and wine got in the way of blogging.  It was needed as it had been a long week.

So "Food Revolution".  Who is watching? 

I watched the premiere episode last night and was highly intrigued and clearly able to sympathize with Jamie and with the people of Huntington.  They have simply been doing what they have always done and are now being told it is wrong.  Needless to say that would make most people defensive, however, what our kids are being fed in schools (and in many cases,what they are being fed at home) is wrong.  All you need to do is to go sit in a mall or any other public place to see human  proof of the issues we have with food in this country.  Food is not used as fuel or for nourishment; we plan most things around food.  We go to lunch with friends, we celebrate milestones with cake and often hors devours come out of a box in the frozen food section of the local grocery store.  We don't look at food as something of nutrition, but more something to satisfy a craving or to fill some missing part of our lives.

But Jamie wants to change all of that and if given a chance, he will.  I am anxious to see how things go for him in Huntington.  If you missed last night's episode, it will re-air this Friday night before a new episode, so make sure you check it out.  And if you have about 21 minutes, please take the time to watch this:

And who is Hilda, you may ask?  The gargantuan zit on my chin.  I am placing her up for adoption is anyone is interested.

6 + 6 + 1= Thursday Thirteen

So with my first official outdoor run today, today's 13 is actually six pros, six cons and one common factor to running on a treadmill vs running outside.

Pros                                                                                           

Fresh Air                                                                                    
Perfect temps this time of year                                                   
No pre-selected speed I have to stick to   
Company of other people who are also exercising                                                                      
Wind feels good when I'm hot                                                    
 Much prettier scenery      
                                                          
 Cons

Cigarette smokers in the park
It gets hot wearing black
No pre-selected speed to keep me consistent
Other people hearing me trying to breathe
Wind is work to run against
Uneven pavement and hills


But all in all, what both have in common is that it is good for me and I feel great when I'm finished.

I did a total of three miles today, but didn't run even one mile straight through, but that's okay.  I had emailed a question to John The Penguin Bingham, the author of the books I am reading, about the headaches after running (which have improved by the way) and he said this:

Hi Kim,

It's actually a great question. I'm glad that you asked.

Before we get to the headache, though, let's talk a little bit about how
hard it should be to run two miles. First off, you shouldn't ever feel like
you're about to die. That kind of thinking will make you hate running and
you'll quit in no time.

Two things: 1] you should be able to carry on a normal conversation while
you're running. If you're breathing is so labored that you can't, you need
to slow down. 2] you should be doing lots and lots of walking at this stage.
We start our new runners with 30 seconds of running and 5 minutes of
walking, for 30 minutes. Little by little you increase the running interval.

Chances are - and I'm not a doctor - that the headaches are caused by low
blood sugar. It sounds like you're just pushing too hard.

So, relax. Enjoy the process. Be kind and gentle with yourself. It's the
only way to run for the rest of your life.         

So I am chilling a little bit.  I still have my goals, but with running outside with uneven pavement and hills, none of which I have on the treadmill, if I want to walk a bit, I'm going to walk a bit.  I ran A LOT, but it was in intervals, about a half mile at a time and then I'd walk for a few minutes.  Either way, it's all good.

Thursday 13 is a little blog meme.  If you want to play,  you can do so here.

I Have to Ask....

 Because I am so READY!

This morning, my ten year old comes out of his bedroom with a green, puffy jacket on that has just been handed down from the teenager. 

JJ: I have one question.

I watch as he puts his hands on his hips and gives me a pointed look, then says without so much as cracking a grin, "Does this make me look fat?"

He slays me, I swear.  He is so damn funny.

I met Tod for a walk tonight and as he approached me at the top of the park, he says, "You look so skinny!"

To which I replied, "Yeah, well, I have not lost a damn pound!"

And I haven't.  But still an awesome compliment.  Still, I hunger for that 199 on the scale.  Longest plateau of my life as we are going on a year now.

The Church Lady is on my last nerve this week, reeking havoc wherever she goes and stirring the shit pot to the point where I am trying to come up with a way to not be present tomorrow when she comes in to run the bulletins.  I swear, were it not for her, the VOLUNTEER, my job would contain like no stress at all.  She causes all of it.  Ugh.  Annoying.

So what do you all think of this? 

I certainly don't think it is a bad idea at all, but like one commenter stated, movie popcorn twice a month is not responsible for the obesity epidemic.  But even with that being said, I hate going anywhere that I don't have a healthy alternative to choose for food.  When the options are Crap and Crap, it annoys me.  Sure, I could say "nah" and just not get anything at the movies, but I have trouble saying "nah" to popcorn as it is just part of going to the movies (but reading that eating it is the equivalent of 6 McDonald's cheeseburgers will probably help me resist temptation going forward).  I always sneak in my own Crystal Light water because I am not paying $5 for a bottle of water.  They can bite me.  So if it happens, kudos to Sony!  It is minimally a step in the right direction and maybe more institutions will follow in their footsteps.

So what do you all want to know about for Thursday Thirteen tomorrow?  I like this meme once a week but some weeks I have no freaking clue what kind of list to do.  Suggestions?

Running outside tomorrow.  Wish me luck!

Different Goals for a New Week

So though I have not yet run above two miles, today I kept my speed minimally at 4.0 for the full run.  I only changed it the last .20th of a mile and that was to up it to 4.2 to finish strong (and fast because I was tired!).  I think on Thursday, I am going to take my run outside to see how it goes.

I took Zumba last night as Jack is not teaching this week and "Wooo!" Substitute teacher grates on my nerves.  It was fun.  Not as good a cardio workout as kickboxing; I did break a sweat, but not my usual Tuesday night, dripping wringing wet sweat.  And I think I hurt my foot in class as it has been killing me today across the top.  Surprisingly, it did not bother me during my run, but I have been icing it since then...as well as my knee and shin.  Yeah, have totally not run in four days!

Tomorrow, I am walking with Tod as the weather is warming up again after several days of rain.  So glad we are sitting on the precipice of Spring at long last!

My teenage son firmly believes I bought an $800 handbag from Kelly.  Kelly sells Beijo bags and she had one I loved, so I ordered one in brown and she dropped it off for me today.  When Aaron arrived home, Kelly and I were still talking and he asked what was in the bag.  I told him a purse I had ordered from Kelly.  Mr. Gullible then says, "Wait (because for some reason, he must precede most sentences with that word...I guess we are waiting for him to finish the thought??) is this one of these $800 purses?"  Without even looking at each other, Kelly and I say in perfect harmony, "yes."  He was all shocked and freaked out and I told him to please not tell dad I spent that much (bag was $59), so now he is running around as if he knows world's biggest secret.  Too funny.

Okay, all for today, but does anyone else feel like their butt has been kicked by losing that hour's sleep over the weekend?  Why do we have to have Daylight Savings Time anyway?

Do We Ever Really Gain Wisdom?

Part of health is mental and trying to figure out the right things to do.  I often second guess myself when it comes to matters of the heart, even when the situation at best, seems toxic.

I had this friend in high school; well, middle school actually.  She wasn't popular, so when I moved here from California in the 8th grade, she took to me pretty quick (at least this is how it is in my memory; it was a long time ago) and I latched on pretty fast too, being the new kid and all.  She was a little different from other people I had met before and not very well liked, but I liked her well enough and she introduced me to the handful of friends she had and I liked them too. 

And so it began; a friendship that started out well enough.  We spent hours on the phone, we wrote stories together, she introduced me to makeup and to Christ, by taking me to my first Christian concert.  We sang in the youth choir together and we walked back and forth across town to each other's homes.  Despite her oddities in some things, we talked all the time and I enjoyed her friendship. 

High school started and I was no longer the new girl and I discovered drama club, which led me to new friends.  I was friends with this girl and with my other friends as well, but things started to change a little bit.  By our junior year, she had said mean things about me behind my back and had kissed the boy I had a huge crush on (purely for shock value because they weren't really friends or dating or any of that) right in front of me.  Then she acted as if she had no idea why I was upset.  It was almost like she wanted to erode our friendship. 

Did I talk about her behind her back?  Probably.  We were teenagers, but of course, it is always easier to remember the wrongs that were done to us than to remember the wrongs we caused.  So, no I can't remember any specifics of things I may have said or done, but that doesn't mean they didn't happen. 

By senior year, we were barely speaking and then she gave me a note, saying she was sorry and asking for another chance to be friends.  Tentatively, I agreed and two days later, she was speaking badly of me again to a mutual friend, who told me what she said.  I ended things for the last time; I destroyed everything she had ever given me and moved on with my life.

Yet through church, our paths continue to cross and it runs hot and cold.  She helped me fold tablecloths once and the next Sunday jumped all over my oldest son for an accident involving he and her daughter (they both knocked each other over in Sunday school).  When a wedding at the church left the cupboards in her Sunday school room a mess, she approached me asking if it was my kids and I shot back at her that no, my kids go to school.  These kinds of little exchanges are the norm for us; one moment it is friendly, the next ugly.  We are both defensive.

But four months ago, her father died after a battle with cancer.  The funeral was at the church and I attended and helped in the kitchen for the meal afterward.  Then four months to the day of her father's death, her mother died, two weeks after a cancer diagnosis and today was the funeral.  Again, I attended and helped downstairs and she stopped and thanked me and we spoke briefly.

My head tells me that this is where this relationship should stay; that once friends, we should simply be reduced to occasional pleasantries.  But something else inside of me wonders why there cannot be a chance for a friendship.  It's always been hard for me to let go, especially of situations where I don't understand why they ended up where they did.  My heart goes out to her right now with the loss of both parents so close together, so maybe that is where this feeling of melancholy comes from.  I just don't know the answers.  It also struck me today that there were no people there her age, like friends.  Most were elderly people who were probably friends of her parents, with myself and two others from high school.  I'm also not sure in the 26 years I have known her that I have ever seen her cry.  It's like she has closed herself off. 

So what to do?  Tell her how I feel and risk possible ridicule or even worse, getting back on the roller coaster that was our friendship?  Or let bygones be bygones and leave it alone?

Finally Friday!

And I finished it strong with another two mile run today, though I really like saying that I ran six miles this week.  Sounds much more impressive, no?  Still don't feel ready to go above two miles as I still do a fair amount of struggling with the two.  But I'm not quitting and I will get there.  It takes time and I have that.

I am also really stoked that changing my blog name is helping me network with other runners and I plan on checking you all out this weekend!  To be a knitting blog, technically, you have to be a real knitter as opposed to a dabbler and I am not a real knitter.  I do enjoy to knit an occasional scarf, but the thing is more or less that I elected to get healthy and that took precedence over knitting.  So YAY for other running bloggers!

I am always intrigued when I am suddenly assaulted by something that comes from several sources which makes it appear that I really need to take a closer look.  A few months ago, I was scrolling through the "Watch Instantly" queue for NetFlix and ran across"Food Inc". I started watching it, but it quickly got to the point where I couldn't watch.  Seeing the way the animals were treated during mass production of chicken or beef was more than I could take, animal lover that I am, so I turned it off after about twenty minutes. 

Then last week, I was having a sushi lunch with Leisl and she was talking about this Clean Diet she was following and she whipped out this book:

I glanced through it but it all came together for me yesterday.  I am not an Oprah fan, but when I saw the preview, I recognized Michael Pollan's name as the author of Leisl's book and while watching Oprah, I found out Michael was also involved with "Food Inc".  So, I have a few of his books on hold at the library so I can take a closer look as I was intrigued by much of what he said yesterday.  What really stuck with me, and I may not have the percentages exactly right, was that twenty or thirty years ago, 17% of our income went to food and 9% went to medical care.  Now, those numbers are reversed.  Food is cheaper due to mass production, but is obviously a lot less healthy for us with the use of drugs and antibiotics on the animals.  I'll be sharing more with you as I do some research as all things food and health now fascinate me.

Okay, I am signing out for the weekend.  It's supposed to be a rainy one, so I am looking forward to some chilling out.  Hope you all are able to do the same.  See you Monday!

Peace out!

Thursday Thirteen

So I've done some homework and discovered nothing I didn't already know but apparently needed to be reminded of.  So some random snacks that are both filling and relatively healthy:

1. Apple and peanut butter


2. Apple and Cheddar cheese


3. Tuna and crackers


4. Cottage cheese and crackers


5. Raw veggies and low fat dip


6. Fresh fruit and low fat, low sugar yogurt


7. Edamame (which I love)


8. Fruit smoothie


9. 100 calorie popcorn


10. Hard boiled egg


11. Lean meat wrap with mustard


12. Nuts (though I am not a huge fan)


13. Bean salad

A lot of this stuff I actually have at home and some I need to stock, but in a nutshell, I just need to do better.  Today has been a vast improvement as my only snack has been a 100 calorie bag of popcorn and I will be heating up lunch in about a half hour. 

Today is a cross training day at the gym, so elliptical and weight work.  I'm on it!

Want to play along with Thursday Thirteen?  You can do so here!

Grueling Second Mile

Not sure if I will ready to advance to above two miles by Friday's run or not.  I knew today would be tough because of Jack's class last night and I was right.  The first mile was pretty good; it had its rough moments, but all in all, not too shabby.  The second mile however was draining.  I have been playing with the speed and ran the first mile at a 4.0, where my usual runs until now were about a 3.8.  At times, I up the speed to a 4.4.  The second mile at a 4.4, my right knee began to play up almost immediately.  I backed the speed to 3.9 and gradually worked back up again to the 4.4 and was more successful the second time. 

I still think today's issue were from not even having a full twenty-four hours to recover from kickboxing.  That class is pretty physical and grieves my knees a bit too.  So, we'll see what Friday holds.  Oh and did not have a headache when I finished my run today...but I have one now.  Go figure.  I just keep sucking down water to try to remedy it.

Food is still somewhat of an issue for me.  At work, I am constantly wanting to nibble.  It may be because I am behind a desk and by myself most of the time.  I am a social and now physical creature and having to remain at a desk in solitary to an extent spurs me to want to eat.  Once I am home, the story changes.  I have things to do that require motion, ergo, my mind is no longer wanting food.  So what is the solution?  Not sure yet.  I try to pack healthy snacks but still feel as if I am eating too many of them.  The oatmeal for breakfast doesn't stay with me very long but it is keeping me..well, regular, if you know what I mean, so I hate to give it up as it is doing what I need for it to do in order to avoid pain.  So I eat that around 8:00ish and by 9:30 I am looking for a snack.  I try to dissect if it is true hunger or head hunger and that is fine line; fine enough that I have not yet figured it out.  I do think I need to revamp my snacks for something more satisfying that will keep me satiated longer.

I also need to research the best thing to eat after a run.  I am wanting food by the time I am home and I know my body needs to refuel a little.  But as I am trying to create a calorie deficit, by calories in, calories out, I can't be continually loading up on empty calories.

So, it looks like I need to get going.  I have homework to do and I'll let you know what I find.  Might even make Thursday Thirteen, the Food Edition.

Kick It!

 Kickboxing tonight was awesome.  Jack was feeling very social and quite funny and as always he is amazingly observant for having a huge class full of people.  He's been doing a tiny bit of yoga-ish stuff at the end of our floor work and one of the positions requires us to sit on our knees.  Well my knees aren't into that so much, so I alter things so I don't have to do that and last week he apparently noticed as he spoke to me about our other floor work tonight.  For example, when we are on our knees and elbows doing leg/butt work, he asked how I was dealing with that.  I explained some nights it wasn't too bad, that one knee plays me up more than the other one and when it was bad I had to stop for a minute.  As we were having this conversation before class started, he offered me an alternative solution to the exercise of lying on my back and raising my ass cheek with my leg in the air kinda thing.  I told him he had lost me, so down on the floor he went to show me.  This is why I lurve this man.  He is funny, attentive, but more importantly, he is a teacher.  He makes the class enjoyable, pays attention to the participants and points out any errors anyone is doing which could cause injury. 

So, good class tonight and it has to last me two weeks as Jack won't be there next week and the gal who covers for him I cannot freakin' stand.  So maybe I will try to pick up another class next week because I enjoy the group setting to break up the monotony of my solitary workouts.  I would love to have a workout partner but it is not in the cards right now, so the weekly kickboxing give me some camaraderie with other people with similar goals. 

Now with that being said, after my two mile run yesterday, I felt every squat and kick tonight as if it were the first time.  My calves felt tight and my thighs ached, but by the end of the workout I felt looser.  Of course tomorrow is a scheduled run day, so that will be the true test of stamina.

Wish me luck.

Feeling My Age Today

So as the weather was nice yesterday, I opted to work in the front yard for a few hours to get things ready for spring.  Today, I worked, started my period and did my second two mile run (yes, I did it on Friday...thought it would kill me...more on that in a moment) before running two errands and going home to do some serious gardening in the back yard.  Now, everything hurts and I am ready for bed at 7:47. 

The run on Friday was sheer torture, but I persevered.  It was hard.  Really, really hard.  I was soaked when it was over and all I wanted was a place to quietly die.  My calves were killing me for two days after, but I also reveled in the fact that I had run two miles.

Today's run, though still hard, went better.  I just should not have pushed things with the yard work afterward.  The only really weird thing is that with both Friday's two miles and today's two miles, I ended up with a headache by the end of the run.  Any takers on why this would be?  I also still have the headache into the evening.  WTH?

Though I have never been a fan of cooking shows, I saw a preview last night for Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution and I am intrigued:

"I believe that every child in America has the right to fresh, nutritious school meals, and that every family deserves real, honest, wholesome food."

With the obesity epidemic getting worse in this country and having once been a big part of it, I have to stand behind anyone who can use fame or otherwise to try to change it.  I'm anxious to see what his plan is; it premieres March 26th on ABC.

The church lady is trying to drive me up a tree.  She makes mountains out of every little mole ant flea hill she possibly can.  It's bad enough she does this with church stuff and inconveniences everyone who happens to be in her path, but she likes to pick the moments when I am the busiest to ask me stupid questions.  Case in point...today's conversation:

CL: Well, good morning, Kim.  I see you are all dressed for spring.

Me: I am dressed for the gym (I had on knee length workout pants, sneakers, my shirt and tank covered by a thumb hole hoodie, and a hat.

CL: Oh, the gym.  But you have a hat on.

Me (wondering what the hat has to do with the price of eggs anywhere) Yeah.  I'm running today.

CL: Oh and you need a hat when you run.

Me: (thinking this is worse than the Spanish inquisition) No, but it helps catch some sweat.

CL: Oh, you sweat when you run.

What planet is she from?  Seriously?  Maybe the running has nothing to do with the headache.  Maybe it's all her.

Sweet Friday

I am so looking forward to putting my feet up tonight and relaxing!  Tomorrow is going to be busy...trip to the dump, two birthday parties, a veggie tray I need to buy stuff for and put together.  So tonight, I just want to chill...

...especially since today is the first two mile run I have scheduled and I am a bit nervous.  I'm sure it will be fine, but still...when I think of running two miles it feels a little bit overwhelming.  I'll let you know how it goes.

I get a little bit freaked out when people tell me I am inspiring them.  I don't quite get it, but maybe it is because I have never seen myself as inspirational and it certainly isn't my goal. I think it is a good thing and when I think about it, if I can help one person, through this blog chatter, to start making themselves a priority in their own life, I am honored to be able to do that.  It took me a long time to be able to do it for myself, but until we do it, nothing will ever change.  And it isn't selfish.  If we don't take care of ourselves, we won't be around to take care of anyone else, so making ourselves a priority is actually out of a need to be around for those who love and need us. 

So yeah, if I inspire you in some small way, I'm happy to do it.  I went through the first half of my life (well, first half, providing I don't die like tomorrow or something) really big, with a body that didn't allow me to do the things I wanted to be able to do.  Now, though surgery gave me a boost or a head start on weight loss, I've also busted my ass at the gym for a long time now.  I made a deal with myself before I ever had surgery and that was that I was going to do my part to make this work.  If I was not willing to commit to that, then why was I putting my life on the line on an operating table in the first place?  And no, none of it has been easy.  I sweat a lot doing cardio and there are so many moments I just want to quit. I ache in the evenings after I run, but the next morning, I feel great.  It's a give and take; a love and hate relationship I have with exercise. 

I got all pissed off yesterday because it was a cross training day for me and I was a little pressed for time due to a delightful sushi lunch with a friend, so I chose the elliptical as my poison.  Now, the hootchie mama next to me on her elliptical, decided to have her blue tooth in and was handling her business calls LOUDLY as she worked out, so I had to really crank up my ipod to not hear her.  But the other part of that is that I don't really believe anyone should be that kind of distracted while working out.  I just don't, for a couple of reasons.

First off, if you are listening to someone else, you aren't listening to your body.  It could be sending you a warning signal about something that you may be ignoring as you aren't paying attention.

Secondly, how hard are you really working if you are chatting the whole time?  I try to push myself during cardio and that means I can maybe grunt out a word or two to you, but don't ask me to help you solve world hunger or something while I am running or on the elliptical.  I am trying to get my heart rate up and trying to keep it up so I can burn the maximum amount of calories and fat and to improve my cardio vascular system.  I only got one body, honey, and I would like it to last me awhile yet, so like changing the oil in the car, I need to keep myself primed and in good working order.

I have recently passed on the website for the C25K Cool Running program to a few friends who are interested.  Follow it to the letter.  You may feel like you can run more the first week or second week, but the goal is that you don't injure yourself and that you build up slowly.  It is a great program and it is what got me started.  Stick with it and be ready to be amazed.  I don't recommend Robert Ullrey's podcasts unless you like techno music, which I do not.  I used it once or twice, but peeps, I need lyrics and preferably inspiration ones with a good beat to git 'er done.  Treadmill timing worked best for me or making up a sheet that told me at what minute I started running, and when I stopped etc.  But whatever works for you.  I think out there on the internet are ways to create your own, with your little bells and whistles to tell you when to stop and start your runs too, for those of you who are technical minded.  And those of you who are, inspire me.

Have a great weekend!  Take care of yourselves!

Thursday Thirteen

So today, I am going to amuse you with my current fave songs, many of which are on my ipod for my workouts.  Please remember that I have kids, so some of these songs become embedded in my head and heart against my will and before I know it, I am singing along to them on the radio, all the while thinking how horrified some of my friends would be.

Okay, here you go, in no particular order:

1. "The Climb" Miley Cyrus.  Scary, eh?  I am not a huge fan of her voice, but I love the song.  Great inspirational lyrics. "Always gonna be another mountain.  Always gonna wanna make it move.."
   
2. "Love Story" by Taylor Swift.  She sucked live on the Grammy Awards but on the radio, this song is catchy as hell.  Yes, I am embarrassed to admit it.
   
3. "Fireflies" by Owl City.  I don't even know what this song is about.  Dreaming maybe?  idk, but I love it.
   
4. "Put a Ring on It" by Beyonce.  Not a fan of hers, but ever since I watched the football players on "Glee" do this, I was sold.  Great song to run to..it has the right beat.
   
5. "I'm Yours" Jason Mraz.  Makes me do hand motions in my car to it while I am driving.  Don't ask; I don't get it either.
   
6. "Bubbly" Colbie Caillat  Absolutely silly song.  I lurve it.
   
7. "Unwritten" Natasha Bedingfield.  Another song with meaningful lyrics. "Reaching for something in the distance, so close you can almost taste it, release your inhibitions..."
   
8. "Black Horse and the Cherry Tree" KT Tunstall.  I chair dance to this...might not be pretty but I have a good time.
   
9. "Bad Day" by Daniel Powder...I found an upbeat version of this on Limewire iTunes that is great for my workouts.
   
10. "Man in the Mirror" by MJ.  I have always loved this song and what it stood for.  Powerful.
    
11. "Right Round" Flo Rida.  I don't think I will ever get tired of this song, even though I always feel the urge to start kickboxing when I hear it...even if I am in the middle of a store.
    
12. "Dream Big" David Cook.  Again, great lyrics that move me.  "'Coz if you don't dream big what's the use of dreaming? If you don't have faith, there's nothing worth believing.  It takes one look to make the stars worth reaching for... So reach out for something more."
    
13. "Halo/Walking on Sunshine" The Glee Cast.  Great beat and has me pumping on the elliptical like nobodies bidness.  All good, baby.

So there ya go. My Thursday Thirteen!

Thursday Thirteen is a little blogger meme. Come play with us, if you'd like!

Drench Your Skin in Words Unspoken; Live Your Life With Arms Wide Open

 I actually ran 1.5 miles today...the day AFTER kickboxing!  

I cannot stress enough how hard it is. I in no way find it easy.  Running is hard work and I am not even running that far yet.  I start and by the time I have done .15 of a mile, I am convinced I am insane and that maybe I smoked a little too much in my twenties because my brain cells are surely fried.  By the time I have hit half a mile, I am pep talking myself:

"Only a mile left.  Only a mile."

Then when I hit .75, I am praying for the freakin' finish line.  The sweat is pouring down my face and dripping from the inside crook of my arms and I am thinking death would be welcome right about now.  Then magic happens when I hit the mile.  Suddenly it is all doable.  I know I will make the mile and a half and despite the sweat and the ache in my knees, I am almost bursting with excitement and feeling an incredible sense of accomplishment.  Amazingly enough, once I hit the mile and a half, it does not take my breathing long to even out...not much more than a minute.  I just slow the pace to a walk and recovery comes quickly.  If running is something you ever wished to do, I say try it.  Start slowly, like with the Cool Running program you can find on the internet.  It starts you out so slowly...like thirty second runs...which are HARD when you have never run before.  I remember those minute runs that almost killed me and now it floors my ass that I am running a mile and a half.  Pinch me.  It is still so hard for me to believe.

And while I am talking about running, I have decided that if I ever run my first 5K, I want to celebrate with something like this, minus the latin:

 I love it.  This foot actually belongs to Denise.  I saw it on her blog and fell in love.  I have been wanting another tat but had no idea what to get or where to put it.  This feels perfect...though the pain of having one done on a boney foot causes me a little pause.

From the treadmill, I did my medicine ball crunches and then did some free weight arm work.  Food was much better for me today too.  Kickin'. 

Tomorrow, lunch with Leisl...sushi!  Then a cross training workout at the Y.  We're almost to Friday, kids!  What is your weekend looking like?

Ending the Night With Stresssssss

Yeah, I totally am, ergo, time to blog.

I'm debating running tomorrow.  Today would have been my run day but it is my kickboxing day and doing both on the same day would be suicide.  However, running tomorrow might be painful because of kickboxing tonight.  I just hate to get way off my self-imposed training schedule.  Tod seems to think I should do one more 1.5 run and then up it to two miles.  He seems to think that the hardest part of running is breaking that first mile, which I have done, and that after that, a runner can advance more quickly.  I'll let you know if that myth is true or busted.

My To Do list is growing in leaps and bounds.  I still have to study and pass my bus driving tests.  I want to paint the bathroom.  I need to touch up painting some woodwork around here.  I am dying to get outside to do some work out there and rumor has it the temps should be in the 50s this weekend.  I can but hope.  I have also promised JJ to do away with his bunk this weekend to give him just a single bed, which means cleaning up his room.  And I have two...TWO birthday parties on Saturday; one in the afternoon and one in the evening.  Grrrr.  The one in the afternoon was supposed to have been earlier so I'm iffy on that one, but would still like to make an appearance.

I am currently struggling with too much munching.  There.  I said it. I bought jelly beans...I have that thing for chewy stuff.  Jimnotmike, I did find those veggie straws at Costco...Yum.  My rule simply needs to be not to succumb to buying something thinking I will just nibble a few, like jellybeans....or peanut butter eggs; thank you Parish Life committee for those little gems.  I simply don't have the self control to have these things in my possession.  There is no "little bit" in Kimland.  My mother offered to buy us milkshakes the other day and I refused mine, tho I had a few sips of someone else's.  If I had one to myself I would have drank the whole thing obviously.  I KNOW ME!  So beings I know me so well, I need to listen to what I know about me and stop thinking I am able to control myself in the face of sugary crapola.  There is no benefit in that food for me and again, I know this.  So, no more buying it.  I am learning to just say "NO!"  And you know what else is weird?  Since my surgery, I occasionally get this hypoglycemic episodes where my sugar plummets.  The weird part is that every time I eat something high in sugar, like jellybeans....an hour later, my sugar tanks.  I don't know anything about the chemistry of why that would be so.  Anyone know?

Ah Monday, Why Can't We Be Friends?

So apparently, Godaddy decided to eat half of my blog submission, which really ticks me off because it is my bedtime and because I am semi-anal, I have to fix this because it looks like a half assed blog entry!

First off, I did change the name of the blog, though the URL remains the same.  This little corner of the blogospere started out as a knitting blog.  Though I still like to knit when I have time, knitting isn't really what the blog is about and hasn't been about in quite some time.  Now, when people are Googling, someting like "Blogs about running" or "Blogs about health", knitten kittens doesn't do much to lead them here.  I have given this a lot of thought and Saturday, took the plunge.

The weekend was really good.  No kids, so Friday night we went out for Indian food.  I decided to be adventureous and ordered something new: chicken and spinach:


 If you have never experienced Indian food, I highly recommend it.  Not all spicy, and you can order most things that are spicy, as non.  Also lots of vegetarian dishes for meatless friends.

Saturday, we picked up mom and journeyed to Costco for our quarterly meat run.  Buying meat in bulk is the only way to go.  Then we hit Gabriel Brothers.  Great store!  We got four hoodies for the kids, two pairs of workout pants for me, a golf shirt for The Brit, four bags of Quaker Rice cakes (which I pay $3 a bag for at Walmart.  .99 cents at Gabriel's!), two bags of combos and a large storage container for $40!  Can't beat that, baby!

Then we went to lunch, where the service was so bad we got it for free:


The Brit and mom before the suck was turned up on the service.

Then after dropping mom off, we hit some pawn shops, looking for an MP3 player for oldest son and on the way, we found a great representation of our little town:


I don't know what is "Comming" soon, but I would be wary of the education level of the employees.

Sunday, was church and I ran another 1.5 miles here at home on my new treadmill.  Dang, I love having one.  Then it was dinner with Paula, Dane, PK and Molly which was much fun.

Monday at work was busy.  And then there are the peanut butter eggs the Parish Life committee at church has made which are like chocolate covered sex.  Holy crap. All bad.

Went shopping with Tod this afternoon which is always enjoyable.  One of the few men in my life who actually likes to shop as much as I do. Then home for dinner cooking and treadmill walking and tonight is finally over.  I have lots to do at work tomorrow and then kickboxing tomorrow.  It can only get closer to Friday from here.  Oh and all my friends are back home where they belong; Em and Dave have returned from their cruise and I think Kelly is back from California.  I miss them on Facebook when they are not around!